|Reviews for It's A Business Doing Pleasure With You|
| eqgzmama 6/21/10 . chapter 25
I enjoyed your story. :-)
Don't worry about grammar, it will come (or you can get help!), focus on the plot!
You have great ideas-keep writing!
| Pearlblue5 6/19/10 . chapter 24
I loved the story! :) Very adorable and lovable characters. But one thing really confused me. Sometimes in the story it interchanges between Carter and Harper as Kole's last name. Especially when referring to his step mom or dad. :S
| wabam 6/19/10 . chapter 1
I love it! Great job with this!
| SparklingStar25 6/19/10 . chapter 24
omg! I absolutely adore this story!
and the characters are just amazing! Loved it!
| CrimsonSilence 6/18/10 . chapter 25
Aw sad day it's over. *tear* love them. *grins* yay for pancakes totally appreciated that. and I loved kole's analogy for his love.
| Muffins Have Hearts Too 6/18/10 . chapter 25
Funny how people who "can't read" your story make it this far _-_ I am less than pleased. However, I am much more than pleased with the way you ended it :) In my mind they have two children, a real house, a dog, a cat, three fish named after Disney characters by their youngest child, a door frame with measurements on it, and lots of happy stories to tell. I can't wait for the next story (I'm voting for Racing Destiny right now :P).
Everyone makes mistakes, and most people don't notice them because you know what you want it to say and just read "now" instead of "no." So what? Those mistakes make it into hardcover books! Landon is out searching for trolls on your stories to ...talk... with them about manners, but if you want/need a beta, I'd do it. Who knows, it might make my characters jealous, and they might actually make me write :P I remember when you started this :) Those were interesting conversations via msn or starbucks. Now I want a new one! In a totally non demanding way, of course :)
| Terras1fan 6/18/10 . chapter 25
Another really good aid to getting your spelling and grammar right for the first post (without too much hassle) is to get a dedicated editor. Someone who is willing to read a chapter, quickly edit and then send back. Believe me when I say it makes the story a lot better.
For example, when I was writing a story with a minor character named Stephen, some time during my writing I changed his name's spelling to Steven without even realizing it. My beta caught it tho. (:
Also, flamers are mean people who just love to rip apart stuff; anything and everything is open to bashing to them.
I hope you do get a chance to start a sequel (her best friend and his brother, no?). I would love a chance to see a more indepth look at Connor's life and her job. It sounds super fascinating.
Lastly (as this is a ridiculously long review -but I'm being lengthy because I feel bad for being a no-review givin' reader), my constructive criticism is for a fine tooth comb on your spelling. I remember running into some errors like the sentence was "I was raining" but you meant "It was raining." Etc.
More so though I ask for more from your characters. They weren't Mary Sues, which is very good for a nano story, I might add. However, as a reader I want depth. I want to relate. I need more interactions between the leads and other people. How does she react if someone cuts her off? What classes is she taking? What enemies does she have? And vice versa, for the male lead, what does he do on the job? Does he have any problems at work? How would he treat a new employee?
All these types of things give the characters depth for a reader. Though including too much will drown us, I would still love a better look at these characters. So that I could become more endeared to them. Ya know?
PS. Adding you to my author alert so that I can catch the sequel if it ever happens. (:
| iiHEARTyuu 6/18/10 . chapter 24
Aw, so that's the end of the story already, no epilogue ;) lol no more Noelle & Kole (haha, they rhyme ...) but at least there's the sequel to look forward to. I'm gonna have to go check the summary out.
I think if you do edit this, something to think about it this chapter. As much as I loved it (so cute :D) I think it was a little rushed? Proabably because it was originally two chapters. It's probably just me though, but it was kind of fight, run away, make-up. And as much as I love that they make up quickly (I thought that there'd be the whole misunderstanding, and not talking for a few days. But I'm glad Kole came to his senses quickly!) maybe slow it down a little. I don't know if I'm making much sense, because reading what I wrote it kind of doesn't. But when I read through this chapter it just felt a little rushed. And please don't take this the wrong way, I'm hoping this was constructive and not mean or anything ... But yeah, I enjoyed this story :) there's quite a few stories out there about fake marriages, but this has been a fun one to read :) can't wait to read more of your stuff!
| lizena 6/18/10 . chapter 25
I can't wait for the sequel! i love this story
| P 6/18/10 . chapter 7
It's Matt Nathanson. I tried finding him and turns out a lot of people misspell his last name.. :S So don't feel too bad.
| Sweet.Linda 6/18/10 . chapter 24
Final-flippen'-ly! They admitted their feelings for each other!
I'm so happy they're gonna live happily ever after. :)
Awesome story, by the way; I loved every moment of it. x]
| SCKidd 6/18/10 . chapter 25
Hey i loved ur story and just so u know i never once noticed a grammar mistake, besides a few typing errors which happens to everyone, i was too in love with ur story to even notice. Thanks for the great read _
| hayley 6/18/10 . chapter 25
How was my criticism NOT constructive? Constructive criticism exists to help someone make something better. If you went through your entire story and changed everything I pointed out, it would no doubt be a better (and maybe even READABLE) story. So my criticism was NOTHING BUT constructive, with an added bonus of snark.
I won't say I'm sorry, even though I know I'm being quite a jerk, but I suppose I get this way because I am excited by the potential of a plot, only to be let down by it's less than stellar execution. I WANTED to read this story, but I just CAN'T.
| RMB4 6/18/10 . chapter 1
I want to tell you I really enjoyed reading your story. I read about the nasty comments. Just remember - you can improve your grammar, but if you don't have a good story line in your head it won't do you any good. There's probably room for improvement - english isn't my first language so I'm not the one to judge - but the story itself is there. Once you've mastered the more practical side like grammar you have it in you to be good!
| 11cina24 aka cassbeastbomb 6/18/10 . chapter 25
Yay for sequal!
Pff, that Haley person can SUCK
It doesn't matter, your grammer isn't too bad to the point where the story is confusing. It's okay, everybody does it every once and a while.
Ooh, Killian, I like that name. Very, unique. Goshh, I wish my name was unique and not plain old cassandra. Jeeze.
Anyway, I will be patient and I'm on you Author alert list so I'll review as fast as I can whenever the day comes where you write the first chappie to your sequal![: