An oxymoron (plural oxymora or oxymorons) (from Greek ὀξύμωρον, "sharp dull")
is a figure of speech that combines contradictory terms.
They're EVERYWHERE!

Unless you're high as fuck I'm preeetty sure you do it in a depressed way. I doubt anyone comes home going 'Golly gee! I feel so great I'm gonna slit my wrists!" Although then again, with humanity these days . . ..

You make this crap readable ;) Instead of crying to stop my eyes from burning, I'm laughing my ass off... Here's to you and the funny :)

Hey

Just want to say that your commentary is the best I've seen, I've laughed out loud so much my boyfriend had to ccome and check on me XD

Snoop Dogg! Why are you doing in this fic!?

OH MY GOD, A NEGATIVE REVIEW AT LONG, LONG LAST! *swoons in delight* And from an anonymous guest reader - truly the bravest of all souls! *leaps into hater's arms* Good sir/ma'm, your extensive and highly constructive critique of how seriously I take the Internet (as you can see I obviously do) has helped me achieve my life's goal: To apparently be important enough for people who don't even like me to give a shit about my existence. For that, dear hater, I thank you. WE SHALL BE MARRIED IN THE MORNING!

You fail forever for taking this seriously. And you're not funny.

U fckin sun of a birch!1111 Wut iz dis shit!? Go fu- bwahahaha! I can't do it! Sorry, V, no flames for you though I will offer this; brava, milady, brava.

And yayness, I've lived in the two Most Quarantined Places on Earth!

After your comments on the exercise routine, I think you really ought to submit an original story. I'm enjoying your comments about My Immortal, but it's so bad ANY writing would look good by comparison. You show wit talking about a totally different subject, so you probably could tell a good story.

That awkward moment when I'm much more interested in Samara, Blade and Jill's story than Enoby's...

You're quite something. Stars for being politically incorrect, and I'm looking into the rest of your stuff!

In this fic you said that you weren't aware that blood comes in other colours than red. I just wanted to inform you that it does. For example, animals who belong to the molluscan class have colourless blood that turns blue when exposed to oxygen. The blood of some insects is the same. Lizards in the genum Prasinohaema have green blood. It just bothers me when people assume all blood is red.

this is hilarious, good job. Most my immortal commentaries are cringeworthily full of 'intelligent corrections' of spelling and bad, BAD humour - but this, this had me giggling enough to question my own masculinity.

Dude, 4 pairs of earrings isn't that much. I know somebody with 9 piercings in each ear.

OH MY GOD A NEGATIVE REVIEW AT LAST! *tacklehugs Jeldaly* But sweet Jesus, did you pull some nasty cards on me, and I do feel the need to defend my honor *dons armor and helmet*:

1) The Mr. and Mr. Smith joke was a reference to the movie "Mr. and Mrs. Smith," in which two spies' marriage suddenly starts falling apart, though they can't figure out exactly why. I was merely joking that if Mr. Smith was actually gay, it would be quite obvious why his marriage to a woman didn't work out. If anything, it was anti-homophobic - but probably a bit too much of an in-joke to be very funny, I'll give you that.

2) I wish I could be clever and use the "my sarcasm was just too subtle for you" line again here...but I really can't. I guess I did mentally connect the Middle East (as an area, not a race) to terrorism and warfare because, hey, that's what's on the news every night. Revolutions, tons of soldiers dead, a million stories about car bombings in the paper - it seemed a safe assumption. BUT! That doesn't mean I think all Middle Easterners are terrorists. That just seems to be the general area where the most explosions are happening, most of which are not the citizens' fault. Race has nothing to do with the joke, and I'd have written the same sort of line if these things were happening in West Kansas. It's called defensive humor and I have it in spades, even if it does make people want to slam the Racist Button as hard as they can.

3) As for Hogwarts...I have no defense. I am just a poor ignorant 'Merican fool who didn't know that. My apologies. *commits nerd seppuku*

Reply rant over. Hope you keep reading and don't still think I'm a Nazi hobo. -VmS-