what a fantastic poem. great story :)

i like how it runs on, like how a child can, in a summer field,

never cease to dream.

"And I told you once that when I was a kid my dad yelled, but you taught me how to play poker in the singsong September swan drive".

I like that one; it feels orange juice gin in summer.

'and somewhere there is a

picture of me sitting beside

you, smile wide though my

teeth don't show in the whirl

of scenery like a sea of green,'

That was my favourite part :) it sounds beautiful and I love it. You are such a master of words.

That was some great imagery to potray with your sparse, but incredibly deep, poetry/prose. Your writing has this superb quality of making me reread it to gain a greater understanding of the picture you're trying to portray. It's a great quality for any writer's work to achieve :)