OMG Rida now this is what i call a fantastic story and ofcourse -CONCEPT!This has been my favourite story of yours so far! and u know that :) Keep writing!

Amazing story-line.i loved the switch of POV's and the way you really deep :)

there are some grammatical them up n its a perfect short story ]

Fix the punctuation and typos and I think you've got a decent-like story. Also, you're posting all five chapters on one section. You can split that using the uploading tool.

- Datarin