|Reviews for An Abiotic Annexation|
| name redacted 8/8/10 . chapter 1
This flows absolutely beautifully. I love the way it reads/ sounds, and if it wasn't midnight, I might even try to read it aloud. Also, nice use of vocabulary. The only thing is (it could just be becaues it's late) that I don't think I get it. I read through the poem a couple times and, after translating it into plain speak, I get it a little, though some of the lines such as "for innards of Doyen" (why of a doyen?) and "eyes lining through kohl" (which is eye liner, so would that be redundant?) don't quite make sense to me. Also, I looked it up, and so far as I can tell, ilacced isn't an actual word. Don't get me wrong. There are some beautiful passages in here, and some very strong ideas. I just find that a lot of the actual meaning is clouded over by the heavy usage of allusions and obscure word choices. Also, what's the deal with the italicized words? Once again, it reads fantastically. Love this poem.