Still too short...

And...

sorry to say this but...

it wasn't romantic to read...

though you are improving...

just a little adjustments on the grammar...

Good luck and update soon!

Are these really something you made up? or you got it as an idea from something else?...

...

...

Or did you copy some things about it..?

How can you possibly think of all of these?

I don't even know what the other things mean...

Anyway, nice chapter.. though it's still short...

Short but a good start. Though you have to make the summary a bit more interesting... Well, that's all i have to say!