Aw, I think this is realistically depressing :( Which is a good thing for your poem because you're packing emotion into words. Sad how many people feel this way.

ANYWAY my favourite phrases in this poem are "Walking through life in a corrupted haze" & "I'd rather die beautiful then be here"

But for the second phrase your 'then' should be changed to 'than' because it's a comparison, same goes for the next line :) Just a little tip to help.