That was beautiful.

The things I like about this poem is how you explain what happened in these phrases, always keeping a certain rythym-type thing going on. One of my favorite stanzas was:

her beauty blossomed,

a forgotten rose, black and

blue; her cherry lips on mine—

mine. mine. she was mine.

I really liked that. It really spoke to me and was like a climax, ending with the death.

I think you may have some capitalization errors.. but I'm not sure if you are really supposed to capitalize the beginnings of the stanzas. Some people do and some people don't, so I don't think it maters.

I had to reread this stanza, becasue it was sort of hard to understand, but that is probably just because I'm not always good at deciphering poerty..

we ran through streets

in and out of shadows,

portals to the underworld

where she was Queen

Overall, I think you are a great poem writer! I really felt like I knew the person whom the poem is about.

I remember why you're one of my favorites.

ohmybudda. You should publish that. I l-o-v-e-d it :)

such a sad story this tells..i've been having similar feelings myself lately.