|Reviews for Milk and Water|
| Procrastynatyr 7/18/11 . chapter 13
Are you going to update soon? I like the story but it seems you haven't touched it in a while... Anyway hope you update soon!
| Arreana 6/10/11 . chapter 13
Well Fredrick seems to be kind of swooping in and directly out of this story? Again a little abrupt. I'm not sure if you have any intention of bring Neville back into this, he was such a prominent roll at the beginning of the story but now he's fallen off for several chapters without any indication of his immediate return. I like Edward, and I like Bergard immensely (I really want him to be the male lead). I think a whole story could revolve around the members of this household alone. But the story would have me maybe believe the Neville to be the male lead. Well, no, I think I'm just a little confused.
I think the chapter is short because Charlie doesn't really lend much color to things - Ah! - that's not a bad thing, that's just the way she is. She tells things how they are (as evidenced in this chapter) and doesn't do a lot of reflecting. Therefore scenes like this, transitional chapters, go quickly for her!
Can't wait for your next chapter!
| Arreana 6/10/11 . chapter 12
As fun as usual, sorry it took me so long to come over and review. You know how it goes. Anyways on to the story.
I didn't find Charlie to be unlikeable in this chapter, but I did find the transition from meek slave girl to confident female a little abrupt. This is a character development I felt should have taken a larger portion of the book to cover. On another note, I'm beginning to feel a little bogged down by the other characters in this story. I know she's exploring her feminine strengths, and all that, but what we have here is a strong female character completely lacking an opposite and/or opposition to grow with/against. I think this Fredrick character could prove to fill both those roles, and maybe if you ever revisit this story you'll introduce him a bit earlier, to give some negative pull to the story.
The dialogue flows well, the writing's all good otherwise. Nothing to add, I have to read the next one now :)
| TinySliceOfHeaven 6/5/11 . chapter 13
awww, this story is.. sad. :( I mean don't get me wrong, it's nice to read, and it is a good story, but the emotion in it is sad.
I like your description; it's not overly done, but it's not lacking, either. And I don't think so far I've seen any grammar mistakes, unsurprisingly. :) It's pretty well written.
Oh I'm sorry, but Lafyette just bugs me. argh. :P I guess just because I'm the type of girl that slap someone who would try and choak me, but, yah know. :D It's sweet though; he provides Charlie with a small feeling of atraction, and she seems to need that.
It's so unbelievably sad how co-dependent Charlie really is. Unsurprising as well; I could imagine someone in her position would be just like that, but still. It makes me sad for her.
Oh by the way? I'm just nagging, I hope this doesn't have influence on this story; I'm sympathizing, I suppose. :)
Hahaha, I loved how like, almost rude Charlie was in the chapter before this last chapter. And this chapter, come to think of it. She's finally growing a backbone. :)
I won't lie, there were some parts in the story that brought tears to my eyes, but there were also parts that made me smile. You fit this all together well; if it were another story, I might've turned away at.. the third or fourth chapter. xD
Spectacular job so far, and please keep updating! .
| GoneAway-MightNotBeReturning 5/23/11 . chapter 12
Okay, I'm really really really glad that you're better now and have decided to continue your story, because frankly chapter eleven just left me hanging there.
I loved Charlie's characterization and developement. Frankly, she wasn't being that horrible; she just stopped letting people stomp all over her, I think. Barrie is an adorable character, but he cares too much for his own dignity and what others think for his own good.
All in all though, wonderfully paced chapter with equally wonderful descriptions.
Marjorie is a nasty piece of work, isn't she? And I'm looking forward to what Frederick, the bad old uncle is going to do, to further the story...
| Arreana 5/16/11 . chapter 11
It has taken me forever to get to this chapter, I'm sorry! I've bee super busy, which I'm sure you understand!
Anyways, on the chapter, I liked how you ended up handling the whole sex conversation. I agree with your assessment of the "rape card" as you put it. When done well, and subtly, and well, and brilliantly well, I think the author can pull it off. But my policy with things like torture, rape, abuse, etc., is that authors should avoid writing about it unless they have personal experience in those areas, otherwise it just doesn't work right. Anyways, you DIDN'T do that, thank you so much for not doing that, truly. I liked what you did instead, making Charlie's sexual experience more of a chore she fulfilled rather than a wholly traumatic experience.
And I love Bergard. I really want to see more of him, his entrance into this story has thrust Neville right out of it. I'll be interested to see if he comes back and/or how things will develop between Charlie and Bergard. Keep up the good work, but don't stress yourself!
| GoneAway-MightNotBeReturning 4/25/11 . chapter 11
So this is where the story ends, for now. I'm actually feeling kind of disappointed, and I'm wondering where Bergard and Charlie's relationship will go. It's a brother-sisterly kind of relationship to me so far.
| GoneAway-MightNotBeReturning 4/25/11 . chapter 10
Some minor mistakes, as pointed out by Arreana, but the story has really drawn me in so far, so I haven't really been looking out for any really minor mistakes.
| GoneAway-MightNotBeReturning 4/25/11 . chapter 9
All these characters are nicely introduced (as in it's not confusing or hard to follow), and it suits the pacing too, because it sets up Charlie's future separation with Neville and the dynamics between servants.
| GoneAway-MightNotBeReturning 4/25/11 . chapter 8
Might be a bit random, but I wonder why this story is called "Milk and Water"? Is it foreshadowing, or symbolism by any chance...
Anyhow, it's good that Charlie and Neville are getting some time apart, cause Charlie's-not-being-able-to-sleep-without-Neville- around kind of demonstrates what Edward was saying about their master-slave relationship.
| GoneAway-MightNotBeReturning 4/25/11 . chapter 7
The Master slave relationship isn't that grossly disturbing to be honest. I wonder what role Daniel might play in the future of this story though, and if Princess Anna will show up or not. But right now, I'm hoping that Charlie might get some romance in her life. It's sad that she's so lonely.
| GoneAway-MightNotBeReturning 4/25/11 . chapter 6
Yes, their relationship is kind of growing disturbing, but it's a good kind of disturbing, because it builds up the tension for later chapters...
| GoneAway-MightNotBeReturning 4/25/11 . chapter 5
Love the dialogue (it's so realistic), description and Dr Alexandre Lafayette.
| GoneAway-MightNotBeReturning 4/25/11 . chapter 4
Dr Lafayette...is one suspicious guy. I wonder what the King wants him for?
| GoneAway-MightNotBeReturning 4/25/11 . chapter 3
New character! Yay!
*Am hoping that we'll get to know more about Charlie in future chapters*