Oh, I really liked this. Neruda is one of my absolute favorite poets, and I know what you mean—a translation can really only be maybe 90% of the poet's meaning at best, but even so, what does come through is amazing. I think my favorite parts of this poem are the images: "light separated from the eye / by a layer of silk" is such a lovely, lovely suggestion. The best one was definitely the ending lines about the sliver of the sky compared to the number of the stars. It was just enough out of the blue that it really made me think about it, and smile. A very Neruda-esque touch in an ode about Neruda. Well done!

I do have one question—is the spacing between the lines intentional? I know ffnet does it automatically (thank goodness for the ShiftEnter command to reverse it), but it's a bit distracting and it reads a little choppier as a result. Thoughts?

The last lines of this are particularly beautiful. The perfect metaphor to end it! :)

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