|Reviews for Broken Glass|
| thatonegirl 6/8/12 . chapter 1
I like this. Makes me have some hope in humanity, hope that was recently lost. I also like the choppy way it was written.
| Deedee Elle 5/26/11 . chapter 1
I liked it,it had what I thought was a slightly ambiguous beginning. I thought she had been cutting herself at first before the mention of the liquid on the floor.
I liked the fact there is very little description of the characters and everything is driven by the actions and speech.
I suppose the only thing I didn't like was the abruptness of a couple of the sentences though they do link well with the character's mindset.
I think this could develop into something longer and interesting.
| Sakina the Fallen Angel 5/26/11 . chapter 1
I like the way that you refrain from giving away physical descriptions or names of your characters - it creates an anonymous feel and reaches out to more people. I also thought the dialogue you used was good as it was very realistic, flowed well, and conveyed a -lot- of characterisation in this short piece!
| WoodpeckerWho 5/22/11 . chapter 1
I like how neither characters have any physical description and that the main chunk of text is the narrator's thoughts. It gives me a shadowy feel to the entire piece, which I feel relates to the story itself. I enjoy reading the thoughts and feelings of characters, because it helps me to understand them a lot better than just through dialog and actions.
A few very minor constructive notes would be that in the first line, there shouldn't be a comma before the 'and'. Later, [I'd've] would, I feel, be better as 'I would have' - it helps the sentence flow better. Finally, I found myself noticing that quite a few latter sentences started with either 'I' or 'He'. The last one is nothing, really, but just a bit of a pet peeve to me .
Overall, I really did enjoy reading this piece. The final line of 'Or is it?' made me want to read on. There was a lot left to be explained and I look forward to reading more of it if you do extend it :) - Woody.