|Reviews for Obscurité|
| EBSmith 6/6/11 . chapter 1
it leaves alot to be desired, don't get me wrong, short paragraphs can be good, but i get the impression that you randomly thought of it and couldn't wait to get in down. some nice description but it comes across as a bit pointless, you don't have to pad it out with story that you don't want, but maybe imply or refer to a back story that may add some mystery.
| Lia Jenson 6/5/11 . chapter 1
Odd. It's both vivid and SO DAMN VAGUE!
Unless this is a prologue/preface, in which case, just write more and clarify WHAT was "all for nothing."
By the way, there's a minor error in the last sentence: "beats"? I think you meant beasts. Good luck.