| Reviews for Desert Princess |
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Lydia 4/13/13 . chapter 8 A review for the whole story so far. I hope you do not take this criticism negatively. I think the story line is fantastic, but you really need to work on your spelling and grammar. There are recurring mistakes throughout. Perhaps have someone proof read each chapter before putting them up, because It really puts a damper on the reading experience. As for the story, as I said before, I think it's great and has a lot of potential; I will be looking forward to your updates. Keep it up |
Kessareen 2/3/13 . chapter 8Excited for the next chapter! |
Bob 9/21/12 . chapter 7 great chapter! but hime's prediction gives too much away about the storyline, and doesn't leave much mystery left, as you basically just told us all the major plot points, keep up the good work :) |
Lydia 9/19/12 . chapter 7 I'm really interested in this story, and wish that you would update more often, however there are a couple bits of feedback I'd like to give you :) Mainly, I think that you rush into the story a bit, and I think that you should spend a bit more time describing the setting and characters, to help the reader visualise the scene, other than that there a few details that I think you could add, for example, with this chapter, I don't recall you mentioning that Hime was pregnant, and if you did, not enough for it to sink in, perhaps if you added a few statements, such as "Hime placed her hand protectively over her swollen belly" or something similar, to once again, help set the scene. Other than that keep up the good work, I look forward to the next chapter :) xx |
Singer of Time 9/14/12 . chapter 7Woo, I definitely wasn't expecting this. o.o The story's becoming exciting...and I also like how the gods are portrayed, if even for just the glimpse inside her mind; even Sutekh can show concern. Can't wait for more! |
VeiledRaven 8/24/12 . chapter 6UPDATE SOON I LOVE IT |
Nalledia 8/19/12 . chapter 6A great story! I really liked it, and it was just the right amount of development for the pace. Do update soon; I think I've said all I need to say in the previous reviews. Well written! |
Nalledia 8/19/12 . chapter 3Remember to keep characters who speak to each other's dialog on a different line to avoid confusion for the readers. |
Nalledia 8/19/12 . chapter 1Just go over some spelling issues, very minor but there. Great so far, wonderful research! |
Kessareen 6/23/12 . chapter 5Love it! |
hummmingbird 5/29/12 . chapter 2I like the story so far- it is very good, but there are so many characters that its hard to understand who is who. ;) |
hummmingbird 5/29/12 . chapter 1This is really sad. I love the name Desert Princess. Cant wait to see where this story goes! |
Singer of Time 5/20/12 . chapter 5Whoa...Sutekh/Set? o.o Now this story's getting even more interesting. And it explains Kamenwati's demeanor quite well. xP Another great chapter, keep it up! And also, thanks for the review of my story, t'was appreciated. |
Kessareen 4/11/12 . chapter 4Love this story, please continue it soon! |
Goldwords 12/10/11 . chapter 4Brilliant! Please, write more! :) |