|Reviews for Stars|
| Small Wings Flying 5/18/12 . chapter 1
“Since she was a child, she had loved finding out about constellations; what stars they consisted of, the patterns they made, the myths behind them.” – I think a colon is more appropriate there than a semicolon.
“Her parents and grandparents indulged her hobby” – indulged? An odd word choice. Positive or negative connotation? In the context, it’s somewhat difficult to tell.
“thisisspeculation,wehavenothingconclusive,yet.” ? I think that’s the DocX again. A lot of people seem to be having that problem.
“Dusk was reaching out, grasping the world in its hand.” – I love that line.
“When she pulled her head away and looked up, she saw the shapes were close enough to see with just her eyes.” – you’d normally say “her naked eyes” at the end there.
Now that was a good ending. Open ended. Actually, it was all good, save the little nitpricks. :)
| Rogue Energizer Bunny 3/20/12 . chapter 1
I love this. The summary caught my attention immediatly, and then the story was even better. There's just the right amount of detail. And I love the last line. Love it.
| seredemia 2/20/12 . chapter 1
I love stars (shame you cant see them much from where i live), so I decided to read and review this one! I love the way you described the stars. Youre right; they are comforting. I love the innocence this girl has too. Kinda reminds me of the stars that she loves. She grew up with her head up in the clouds.
Ooh, the stars changed colour? Thats not normal...
[Instead of their usual white or yellow colour, the stars were red, blinking pinpricks of blood looking down on them all.]
- this is wonderful. its amazing how you can make something so calm and turn it into something lethal.
I'm not sure if I believe in aliens myself... Its hard to believe that theres something else out there. It would be cool... but scary. And weird.
sixth day? that can symbolise doom... the devil's number. or maybe i'm just looking too deep...
WOAH. DID THE ALIENS JUST OBLITERATE THE PRIME MINISTER.
DOCTOR WHO SHOULD JUST APPEAR OUT OF NOWHERE AND SAVE EVERYONE.
I really loved how you started everything out to be so calm. You made stars look like innocent pretty things, and then bam. No, theyre not. Theyre warnings of doom and death.
| J112011 12/13/11 . chapter 1
Eeeek, that's freaky! For a while I was thinking all the stars would go supernova, including the Sun, but aliens shooting the Prime Minister and the Queen are just as scary.
Well written. I like how you write.
| JamezBfod 10/25/11 . chapter 1
That was well done.