Oh my god. Sara was killed by one of the many sadists on the planet. I hate Bugsy.

I was hoping for Sara to at least win, but I didn't see that coming. Thrilling!

Now onto the rant, gosh freaking potatoes I hated Sara's parents - especially the father. He is such a child molesting asshole! I can't stand them both. If I was Sara, I would give them a big fat fuck yous and shove it up their asses! But the BIGGEST bastard up to date in the story is that freeloading, sexist, sadistic, son of a bitch, Bugsy! I mean can you blame me? This dude is so evil that it'll make Satan himself say, "Okay, that's just low". And that topless chick, Ezrek I believe her name is, she is such a bitch! Sara dosen't deserve all that hatred she's. It's a fucked up world we live in, .

ELA time - The story is great, but you did had some grammatic errors here and there. Edit it, don't edit it. I'm only here for the story.

Okay, that's about it. I hope you have a pleasent day. And great job on this cool thriller!

OKAY, SERIOUSLY? SOME PEOPLE DEFINITELY ARE FILLED WITH NOTHING BUT S******!

Oh great...And to think I thought that she wouldn't trust him so easily...Tsk Tsk...

*gulps* I don't think you should trust that guy, Sara...He's got a mean aura around him...

HOW COULD THE WORLD BE SUCH A CRUEL PLACE?

WHOA! MY EYES BURNED UP! AAAAGH! STUPID DAD!

Wow...To think that would be a "home". That would be creepy and drudgery.

I would sooooo take her in :'( this make me sad .

Sara sat on her bed with crossing her arms to hug herself.

idk this just doesn't sound right to me

"Now Sara you'll be alright, I just want to take care of you" he placed his hand on her inner thigh and he leaned in too kiss her soft red lips.

he leaned in "to" kiss her soft lips.

The man my not show cruelty

The man "may" not show cruelty