Hi! This is really good, I like the way it's going and you're clearly a talented author. You write really well, I'd just suggest that maybe you set up your setting a little better. Anyway, this is really good so keep on writing! :D

Hi there, Nini! I think the best thing you were able to do with this first chapter was also what you intended. Each scene builds to what happens in Chapter Two, I'm pretty sure. Jazmine meets her brother's best friend, Alex, and falls in love, eventually. Great job so far! That's my summary, in brief. I will read Chapter 2 when I get time.

I haven't actually been commenting for the last past entries, 'cause i was really captivated in this story.
it...RRRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOOCCCCCCCCC CCKKKKKKKKKKSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!

I've actually read this before, but i'm reading again cause, it's an awesome storyline, you've just got yourself a fictionpress fan!

Update sooon:)

I knew something bad was going to happen! That was only because Jasmine was all worried, though. I can't wait to see what happens next!

WHAT THE HELL!
SAVE ANGIE PLEASE!
BETTER STILL, GET ALEX NNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWW WWW!
MUST STOP HURTING EXCLAMATION MARK BUTTON!
BUT FEELS SO GREAT, THOUGH!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHHH!
I'm not weirdo by the way! ;)

Okay, suttle is actually spelled subtle. And maybe, you could have Alex move in with Justin for awhile and wait until his mom lets him follow his dream. Then he moves back. During that time he could try to draw Angie's attention and maybe start to date her. Justin becomes a sweetie and apologizes to Blake for the punch and Jazmine decides to give him another go. Jessica turns out to be a nice girl and helps Jazmine. or you could unite Blake and Jazmine

Wow! Can I say drama? Jazmine has 2 boys fighting for her, I'm pretty sure that Angie is going to get hit on by some creep that handed her a card, and Alex just might be going to face the world on his own. Keep on writing!

ommggg finish it its soo good

Hey! Sorry it took so long for me to review!

Now, I'm not really good at constructive feedback, so I'll just say what's on my mind when reading your story.

1. Some spelling errors in different chapters. Spellchecking is always your friend.

2. Things seems to move a LITTLE fast at some points.

3. The dialogue (well, to me) doesn't seem natural at some parts, as well as (again, just me) some paragraphs explaining the situation.

But, as for the plot and story wise, this looks like a good story. I hope my feedback wasn't a little harsh, I'm just trying to make you better at what you love to do. :)

Keep up the good writing! And I'll try to update my story as soon as I can! :D

poor blake, but then again thats what happens when jealousy takes over rational thought, love the story, u should totally continue it :)

love it but u may want to check ur spelling, its a little off

still going strong but was Jazmine's name spelling changed from one chapter to the next?

still going strong, though you may want to see about changing pricings to piercings. i think thats what u mean