jesus dude, you're cranking out some hq shit right there

i like your simplicity and i like your regretful tone

This is an interesting format. It's like you use enjambment (an idea from one line and it continuing to a subsequent line), but at the same time it's not enjambment. Specifically, I'm talking about lines 5-7. The weak and brittle part represents the contrived subject matters in line 7. And then line 6 helps connect the two points, by using a short series of pronouns/stumbling over conjunctions (and repetition). But yet, it's not totally enjambment, because it doesnt follow the strict definition (I could be wrong on that though). I think it really helps this poem though get to the core, because it's a neat concept. It's like the tripping over the words is like trying to find the "perfect" words, which end up just being the same contrived subject matter, which you show is a bad thing. I don't think I'm making much sense with this, so I'll just give the skinny:

I REALLY LIKED YOUR POEM LOL

sorry you had to read this jabber, just know that I enjoyed it, and that you should keep posting!