| Reviews for Damaged |
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DinaK 7/16/12 . chapter 10I was in a state of shock back then, after reading the chapter, so let me make myself clear... Oh my God, this is AWESOME! There's more of them? When will they find Zoe and Ethan? DON'T LEAVE ME LIKE THIS! |
DinaK 7/9/12 . chapter 9Oh my God... |
GMGM 7/9/12 . chapter 1A good premise, and well written for the most part, but there are a few little errors that left me slightly confused. "I'm so ready for this session to be over" Is in the present tense, and this happens on several occasions, excluding the dream sequence. You need to make sure that tenses aren't mixed as it quickly becomes confusing, but with a bit of careful editing that should be fine. In the dream, when Zoe is kidnapped, the kidnapper says your instead of you're, again a small error which just needs a bit of editing. This is purely opinion now, but I think that you need slightly more description in places, and to vary sentence structure a little to avoid seeming repetitive. One more thing, I'd like it made a little more clear as to why she knocked her father out. It seems fairly unprovoked, so if you explained that he is often violent when drunk then it would make a lot more sense. On the whole, I enjoyed it and am intrigued to see where the story ends up, so good work! |
DinaK 7/7/12 . chapter 8Okay, now we wait... I hope they all kick some *** in there... Does Cora have a really powerful power? Or, because she is young, she is afraid of it? Can't wait for the next! |
DinaK 7/6/12 . chapter 7That was great! Update soon! |
xXTaylaJaneXx 7/5/12 . chapter 1I absolutlly love this! The emotions you feel and the images you picture. This is a truely interesting story and looking forward to reading more. X |
DinaK 7/5/12 . chapter 6Indeed, it was a small chapter. But it has important information for what's to come, I guess? Update soon! |
Guest 7/2/12 . chapter 2 Narwhals? Could you explain that to me? I feel as if I'm missing something, like a reference or joke. Anyway, moving on; this story is great, please continue. |
DinaK 6/29/12 . chapter 5Is she some kind of sibyl or something? Great story, can't wait to see what will happen next! |
laneypotomous 6/27/12 . chapter 3 oh girl, you need to be writting more of this junk! and i know you'll keep me updated :DDD keep it up! 3 |
FixedUrFic 6/26/12 . chapter 1You've got a distracting spelling error right in your description, hon. |