| Reviews for Gone |
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lael1bologna 4/25/12 . chapter 1Not to do this to you again, but "you're" would be considered 2 not 1, "your" would be 1. To improve the haiku i would edit it like this: You're gone. The void you left is darker than black. Wont you come back home? Forget the and because you're takes two. Have that be a sentence. you that "the void you left" makes more sense |
Archia 4/24/12 . chapter 1I like how it's almost like it's all one continual sentence, but still follows the form of a haiku. I also enjoyed the story that seemed so much more than there was. Nice job. |