|Reviews for Goodbye, Blue Sky|
| J.Kuzzey 8/5/12 . chapter 28
That meeting is so real. I can't even count the times I've been in a meeting and everyone knows, "This is a giant waste of time, because someone's going to show up and be like, 'Nope!' and we're outta luck." While this meaningless chatter is going on, you kind of tune it out and just sort of watch everyone as they speak nothings.
Hmm Issac is an interesting dude... definitely can't hate him... It's good development for May's character to have that kind of interaction with a Reaper. She's already a pretty good person, but more interaction with the enemy always has some kind of small effect on people.
| J.Kuzzey 8/4/12 . chapter 27
"Lion suddenly notices his stare, starts pawing through the mailbag." I'm so sorry, but I pictured an actual lion's paw digging through a mailbag and laughed for like two minutes. No idea why.
As soon as May said, "If my father were a fucking Reaper." I panicked and just kept thinking, "Oh my God, shh! shh! What are you doing!" May is so awesome, she makes me laugh, manages to kick some butt, but is still a pretty good person.
And again you have a little tale that is just freakin' awesome. It's really deep and again its like we learn about the characters, their world, but we also get a quick little life lesson.
| J.Kuzzey 8/4/12 . chapter 26
Nice job using imagery here: "I'm drifting. On my back. Through an ocean or something." and then not forgetting about it here: "I catch hold of that voice, use it to anchor myself to another world." Shuri's ways to wake him up cracked me up! Also: "She talks calmingly. As if I'm a trapped animal or something." really made the words ring in my head. Like how we greet stray kittens, there's that tone of voice we all use.
Whoa, whoa, back it up. How does he know Andrei's name... did I miss something? Hmm going to the next chapter.
| J.Kuzzey 8/4/12 . chapter 25
I really enjoyed the conversation between Cy and Jules. Really just this entire chapter was golden. It made the story's perspective even broader. We're getting a chance to see Jack and Lin; this chapter helped get me more curious about them. And again, you use a little story to get such a deep point across (this time, with the mule). It gives us a great idea of exactly what's going - or, at least how they feel about it. Then there was that scene on the balcony... Hmm... so many questions yet to be answered. Yeah, I definitely have to keep reading
| J.Kuzzey 8/4/12 . chapter 24
Luco talking to himself to stay sane is a smart move. Otherwise, he'd probably forget he exists, or at least start to question if he did or not.
Venn obviously doesn't take his job very seriously. He's pretty full of himself and I kind of want someone to punch him in the face, haha.
Man, Alex is going to flip if he runs into Andrei. Imagine all the different emotions that would explode at that moment; it could drive someone crazy. I liked how you squeezed in a deep connection between the carp story (of it turning into a dragon if it jumps over the waterfall) and how they are represented by a dragon. Its like he's telling Alex, "You're just a carp, dude. Stop trying to be a dragon; you'll never make it over that waterfall." Good stuff.
| J.Kuzzey 8/4/12 . chapter 23
Man, I really want a painting of this underground lake. I can picture it in my head so well. I had a good laugh at the million questions the kids had to ask. Imagine how crazy that trip through the tubes was when he's already disorientated and tired... that would be a total mind trip, and you can tell by the end of the chapter he's so exhausted he's done. I feel like I'm just slowly taking in this world; bit by bit I'm seeing more and more. It's pretty awesome. Ending the chapter with: "– probably die if we don't get him help soon." is a real cliffhanger!
| J.Kuzzey 8/4/12 . chapter 22
Alright this Al guy... Yeah, I just can't read him. I like that there's so many mysteries in this story. I want to know about him. And "The coin has fifty sides" is so cryptic. I've been wondering about that since the beginning; it was nice to see it keep popping up (since it's obviously key to this whole deal). Looks like Lion got straight up abused by Lance; its nice to get a quick glimpse into his past and see how its all connected.
Let's see how this Courier job works out for them. Ah, I still love May, she's so kickass. Looks like maybe Lion might be getting quite the crush, eh?
| J.Kuzzey 8/4/12 . chapter 21
First of all, I involuntarily laughed at this: "The shards almost seem to glitter in the sun. It looks painful." Because I totally get it. Not sure if you've ever had an injury and the adrenaline is so thick and your mind so preoccupied elsewhere that you don't even feel it; when you see it, it's so surreal because you still can't feel it. It's like you're looking at a wound on someone else. That's the way I took that scene in, and I love that you got that across in two sentences.
"In the name of the law? Did you seriously say that?" I laughed again.
I feel like we're about to enter another arc of the story. I kind of like this Ciel guy and the dynamic he has with Gabe. It's obvious that a lot of people really do not like the Reapers; it's like they all really want to rise up and make themselves free, but they're powerless and afraid. It's a realistic atmosphere and certainly sets the tone for this world.
Long review, sorry.
| J.Kuzzey 8/4/12 . chapter 20
Nikita having to converse with a dead silent prisoner was probably a little bit awkward for him, haha. I liked that scene, though. Especially the breaks into thought. I feel like this story is being told specifically by the characters. This is their story; the plot isn't making them make the motions, they are moving it along themselves. The breaks into thought suit this well. Instead of "let's sit here and describe the color of the ground!" like some people do, you know that its more important to describe the little statements these guys want to make.
I hope that made sense.
| J.Kuzzey 8/4/12 . chapter 19
Haha I laughed when Lion cracked his head on the lamp. He already looked suspicious to the old couple, now he just looks like a bumbling idiot. The couple seems like nice people, but you never know. They're lucky they ran into the couple, though, since May just straight up zonked out. That was so sudden that I panicked a little bit; that was well done, because it gave you a small sense of what Lion was feeling when she suddenly crashed.
The scene with her and the cat toward the end there was kind of heartbreaking. I think it was a great way to express just how she feels at that moment without straight up telling us. That way, we learn to empathize with her feelings.
Ryu! Not forgotten! We get to see that the even the Reapers have humanity within them. "His rifle feels heavy in his hands," says it all, right there.
| J.Kuzzey 8/4/12 . chapter 18
Argh I want to strangle that Venn guy. He's such an ass. I wonder if they find out that Alex is Andrei's brother, they'll distrust Andrei... I could see how that would happen. Would be an interesting piece of character conflict. Also, is that the same black cat from like, chapter 4? Just curious. I love that Lion hates cats but now they're stuck with one, haha!
Random question, but do you draw? I feel like this story would work really well as a comic. I kind of see how it would play out panel-to-panel.
| J.Kuzzey 8/4/12 . chapter 17
Alex and Andrei must like pretty similar. Ah man did they capture Luco? At least Alex doesn't seem to be a complete jerk, so there's always hope he won't end up dead. Alex makes for a good Captain so far, since he is able to keep everyone under control. Now I'm just more and more interested in this Lion guy... what kind of past he has, etc.
| J.Kuzzey 8/4/12 . chapter 16
This chapter was a roller coaster (and I mean that in a good way!). It really feels like a mental battle is happening; how does one stay sane when going through that? The fact that we get a glimpse at what's going on inside the character's mind is just awesome. I also could really feel the rhythm in this chapter with your prose. One of my favorite parts about this story is that it has a distinct voice and pace; the prose is written in such a way that its unmistakable what I'm reading.
| J.Kuzzey 8/3/12 . chapter 15
Ahh captured! This is going to be a tough one to wiggle out of for him. I like that when he's in solitary, he's not really sure how much time has passed. I was afraid some serious torture was about to take place, heaved a sigh of relief when nothing major happened. Another good stopping point for a chapter. You've got him in a difficult situation and you're slowly leading us along with him. Well done.
| J.Kuzzey 8/3/12 . chapter 14
The plot progressed nicely between these two chapters. At first, Lion seemed to be a bit goofy and truly had a don't-care attitude. But he got serious quickly. It's a good thing they have him around or they might already be toast! Andrei is either brave or stupid with his plan; now he just has to get the heck out of there without getting caught. Overall, great pacing and dialogue as usual; awesome place to end the chapter, now I have to read the next one!