very interesting! i thoughly enjoyed this story. definatly dark, and the ending took my breath away. i likes stories like these, not nessacerily "scary" but a little unsettling. i have never read "the raven" but i dont think it could possible be better then this! its pure genius! i really liked the writting style, it kept me on the edge of my seat the entire time. i also thought you used a very good vocabulary range which is great. it helps keep peoples attention and makes the feelings and objects in the story more definitive. the only issues were a couple of grammar things. i think if you read the story over again you would find them, but they are really not that bad. other than that, the story is apsolutly amazing! if i could give it a grade, i would give it a 100\100 :)

Awesome a very chilling one shot but I loved reading it. You should write more stories like it. Great writing.

Wow! This was very well written. I loved all the details and I loved how you made those few details come together in the end to wrap up the story. As bad as this sounds, I loved the morbidity of this...(:

One suggestion I have for you is to edit your story a few times through before posting it (some errors are distracting...maybe just to me?). Although I know how exciting posting things can be(:

Great Job! Keep it up!