this is very descriptive :) xx

I don't like the length of the lines in this because they appear to get a little too long while reading, thus somewhat dampening its effect.

I like the use of natural image in this because it gives it a nice strong effect. Not too hard, and not too soft either, but powerful like the forces of nature in comparison to the confusion whirling within someone when described so plainly.

Ohana from the Review Marathon (link in profile)

Not exactly Haiku, but the imagery was well done. What made you post this in the Haiku category?

The angry inky clouds. Love that description. Nicely done. Not sure its a haiku though, aren't they supposed to have 17 syllables

Very nice. Lovely job, keep it up :D