It's one of my favs if i say so myself

I wish these were longer and more detailed. Great stuff.

Nice.

Remember the poem I mentioned earlier. It was about the same gassing. Go figure.

Nice rhythm. I like the hard sounds in his because it almost sounds like a gun going through its rounds or feet marching, so good relation to war. I don't like though that it drops out in the middle and then comes back because it still seems to cling to a want for that rhythm. It's too structured to be without it when you've started out, but in the circumstance the other thing you could have done was left structure and made it more direct, eg. using plainer words and dashes to really heighten the effect.

This is awesome! I like the rhyme scheme and I love the story. It's short but it's very good! Great job!

Reminds me of World War I. I like that you use words like thrash. Makes your poetry more original. Good job.