|Reviews for The Boy who once Lived|
| Guest 5/10/13 . chapter 6
Having trouble naming chapters? . Here's a great idea. choose a key word or phrase from the chapter that is interesting or funny, and use that for a title. I like your story line. good luck :)
| Guest 2/11/13 . chapter 1
Overall, a good attempt at writing a scary story but I think that there are way too many details slowing the plot down.
| KoscheiTepes 2/10/13 . chapter 1
Very good. I like it. It's a classic horror story. A vengeful spirit getting back against those who wronged him.
| Svfn 12/15/12 . chapter 4
"No way, I'm (not) going back to that place again," Tyler muttered.
I think a 'not' is nessisary. Good work, though there are a few other such typos here and there.
'And suddenly everything became pitch black as the sun has long been set.'
I'd remove the and or join the sentence in with the one before it, because as it is it seems a bit run-on.
I like where the story is going and look forward to more. :) Keep up the good work.
| OxspanxO 9/4/12 . chapter 1
Thanks readers for your reviews and being helpful.
I would be very grateful if you can help me with these chapter names..
Thanks in adVance :D
| Leslie 9/3/12 . chapter 3
It's an interesting idea for a story -haunted neighborhood, new kids on the block. But it's overwritten - you seem to take the long way round rather than the most direct route.
| Guest 9/3/12 . chapter 3
There were one or two places where the story came to a complete stop...
Overall , It was a good buildup suspense :-)
| VIMAL 8/29/12 . chapter 3
i want you to continue this ,,,
| Svfn 8/27/12 . chapter 3
Excelent chapter. I see alot of promise in both your writeing and the plot. The end there was very exciteing, the dialogue is believable and your mistakes are few and far between. I only noticed one tense change that bugged me: The noise has returned again this time closer and seconds later , I came to know what made those sounds.
Other than that this chapter was one of my favorites. I can't wait to read more.
| Svfn 8/27/12 . chapter 2
I mean ,who on earth would be happy to see a poor rundown building which moreover looked like a horror film set ,where we would probably be moving in a few days. (I'd add a question mark at the end even if it was a rhetorical question)
But that doesn't seem to bother me now. (was writen in present tense where as the rest of the story was in past tense.)
Mr. should always have a dot after it.
Staring at all those buildings I could tell that this town's got some interesting history which could explain about these creepy looking and bedraggled houses. (Again this was in present tense, while the rest was in past tense.)
Other then that the errors were simple stuff, nothing to fret over. I'm fond of the story thus far and how you placed the prologue later on in the story. It makes me curious to read more, great work. Keep it up. :)
| Svfn 8/27/12 . chapter 1
Very interesting thus far, I'd read more. Just watch your tenses, you began in past tense and then turned to present tense a few times. It's an easy mistake and can take years to master. I hope to read more details aswell, though it was only the prologue which is a good place to exclude information. Keep up the good work, Svfn.
| Rico 8/6/12 . chapter 1
Maybe you should Redraft your Prologue.
BTW , second chapter seemed pretty fine (Although not much of the plot was revealed).
| sum1 8/6/12 . chapter 1
I think you should come up with better narration, but besides that the story could work
| Reviewer 8/6/12 . chapter 2
A few grammar mistakes but other wise good.
| Guest 7/17/12 . chapter 1
dude i like ur story, u think i can use it script in a minifilm i wanna do?