|Reviews for A Safe Beginning|
| Lorres Chuckler 7/24/12 . chapter 1
Already a catchy beginning. DON'T STOP!
| Grammatical Assassin 7/23/12 . chapter 1
I am sorry, for some reason even though I was logged in my review was posted as a guest, and apparently I have not been a member long enough to send a message to you. So I guess just incase this review also doesn't go through correctly, my account name is Quicktricky
| Guest 7/22/12 . chapter 1
This, I must say is an excellent start. Loaded with intrigue and definitely plenty of room to rock 'n' roll. I do have about 3.6 million ideas for this story popping off in my head as I am typing this so I'll do my best to grab onto a few as they blast by.
1. classic villain scenario: Doctor wants to be immortal so rather than the AI actually getting smarter or "advancing to a human complexity" as it is assumed, perhaps the doctor is simply transferring his consciousness into the program. This could lead to a global domination option or even a silent ruler conspiracy. Once in his immortal form he is able to silently take over the world through many various means. Subterfuge, sabotage, both character as well as literal assassinations, or all the above. Point is now he's in control or gaining control, and your hero needs to stop this from happening or expose what has happened (depending on the setting you choose) before it's too late.
2. Classic Hero scenario: On the other hand maybe the doctor was a good guy that uncovered some plot to use his newest invention as a weapon. He finds out about it and is killed before he can get the truth out. Now it is up to your hero, his loyal friend and possibly a wildcard character with a love story undertone, to save the day.
3. Classic Anti-Hero Scenario: So the main character discovers some things about the doctor and his project that lead him to realize a terrible truth. Perhaps the doctor new his experiment would go out of control or else apply the top two suggestions with a bit of a twist. In the beginning the hero only wants to escape before the Fit hits the Shan, but through cohesion such as the death of a friend, family or something else that might spark the need for revenge, he will inevitably be force to take action. The only real difference here is out for vengeance not justice.
I do have only one small unimportant note. Your main characters that you have introduced in this bit, remind me more of Italian mobsters rather than Hackers or scientists, might just be the slang you chose or the "boss" reference. Not really a big deal just thought I would mention it. Anyway that's all I have at the moment. I hope some of this helps you out.
| Reiz16 7/22/12 . chapter 1
"to witness the flowering of his brainchild." I like that line.
If you don't mind me saying, the style of this story appears a tad more symplistic than your last few stories... But I actually think that is good. Some writers actually prefer such things. Helps the story flow better.
Sounds good. I know that there are a lot of stories in which AI take over, but I know you NEVER go for the generic, so I look forward to more.
No ideas come to mind at the moment, but I shall tell you if I come up with any.