| Reviews for Untitled Story That Will Be Awesome |
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Stetson and Fedora 1103 7/29/12 . chapter 1Hahaha very good introduction to the "bad boy" :) keep writing :) |
Anxious Axolotl 7/27/12 . chapter 1Nice start here, I liked the detail about why Aaron was skipping school, [He didn't want to deal with the bullies, the teachers convinced he was a dead beat, the girls who looked at him with disgust. It was all too much.] , rather than just saying he was too cool or too much of a bad boy to go. I don't know about you, but I'd be pretty pissed off if someone on a skateboard knocked me over. Maybe have the girl be annoyed and Aaron apologise and promise to make it up or something before she says ["You know, I'm perfectly fine with skateboaders... As longas they aren't crashing into me,"], that would seem a little more realistic and add a little bit of length to the chapter (just as I was getting into it - it ended!). I'm also not sure about her running off with a random boy, it sounded like they were skipping classes from the same school, maybe she'd seen him around before? Hope to see an update soon! |