I can relate to this. Why do people hate on the quiet ones.

Oh gosh! This used to be what I go through. It's nice to know people are aware that things like this are happening.

This is really interesting. :D

I know may people find it hard to come out of the closet and this poem really shines light on that everyoen is differnet and you accept them -I salut you .I am just wondering if this boy i christan because he does mention burning in hell anyway Love it thanks for your inspiration for my next one
good luck withh the rest
love neddie

You have an interesting storytelling style. I enjoyed your take on these characters' lives, but I admit it makes me curious about yours. In a way (and I could be completely off base about this, but) it seems you tell others' stories so you don't have to deal with your own. You share your opinions so you don't have to share your feelings. True or not, it doesn't change the fact that I think your poetry has a lot of potential, and I liked reading the handful of these that I read.

Your images are gold; hold fast to them. ("My heart dances in broken glass"? Breathtaking.) I wonder about your loyalty to rhyme schemes... you know, you could say more without them? Maybe try it sometime.

Thank you for sharing these, and do keep writing!

abby

Hi SilenceInHonour: I deeply appreciate the motivation and thought behind these poems- attacking all the stupid prejudices and scapegoating by allowing each narrator to speak in first person, allowing readers who may hold whatever prejudice to see its effects first hand.

One thing I wonder about is the rhyme- not every poem needs to rhyme. I think for heavy poems, rhyme sometimes give a sing song effect that undercuts the power. I found myself wishing the first one and the one about the teen prostitute didn't rhyme.

I love the sing song sound here - it reflects the sing song brain of this particular narrator! I'd be tempted to end it at cruel person- because I don't think this narrator would have the imagination to go any farther than that.

Oh dear- I really like the sound of this one- it flows easily and I can picture the narrator- lol-

Going through poem by poem- thinking this might stand alone? I like the repetition- the narrator with so many resolutions and then the last two lines like a slap in the face. The particular prejudice is never specified, thus covers all prejudices with "just because I'm alive."

Oh I loved this.. The emotion is so apparent. It's like you wrote it to expel all these bad thoughts and it came across very clearly. c:
It had a refreshing amount of honesty... and I liked how you formatted it as well and the quirky little italic comments. Great work

Usually rhyming can get awkward in a piece like this, but yours flowed well.. The first stanza was the best. :3 You always come up with such interesting perspectives! haha

This piece had some good moments.. but I think some of the thoughts were expressed maybe a bit too plainly? Like out of a textbook. Or maybe that's what you meant to do... because of his plain mind... that would make sense :3 hahaha however it is, it's an interesting subject matter.

This really stood out to me.. maybe because it is so nonchalant and yet poignant to the piece...
"My life was great,
His wasn't going so well."

The narrative is great but I would have loved to see it elaborated a bit. Nice work

*Silent admiration* That was a really well written poem; I like that it rimes and makes sense at the same time. The words, you used, are simpel but it still seems like you really took your time to find the right words. - God, did any of that make any sense at all? I hope so. All I'm trying to say, is that you've written a very well poem and that you should be proud of yourself.

Also, I love that it's about a gay guy. You can really feel his frustration about the fact that his gay.

Keep up the good work.