FictionPress.com - let the words flow
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| Starlite nightfall:MOO MOO 2005-03-27 ch 1,  | abuse^_^...so...did it stop? I liked this. |
| Pyreflei 2005-01-11 ch 1, | abuseI feel for you there. I've been dumped in the gutter a few times to by bastards who don't know how to treat a woman. There's a lot of raw emotion in this, as far as I can see. This reminds me a lot of a character of mine from my story "Artificial Wings". Said character I will not name as it will ruin the plot line. But they were raped and went through a bunch of emotions very similar to this, what you've written I mean. But my heart goes out to you on this poem. |
| Ocha 2004-02-02 ch 1, anon. | abuseThis is pretty basic language, and it doesn't hold my interest. Try using images to show how you feel. When you use bland language and cliches of this sort, you come off as shallow, and the real depth of the feelings you claim to have felt is lost. Find a way to say these things unique to you - really delve into the details. How did he treat you like **? Be specific, know what you mean to say before you begin to write. Then describe these things through the images that come to you through your experiences. Describe things about him, things he did that made you upset, or insanely giddy. When you discover these things, you have a real poem. Proper grammer also helps, unless you're planning on making a statement. |
| MistyEyes 2002-12-05 ch 1, | abuseI feel this way sometimes! |
| Fumi Ayakoganei 2002-09-02 ch 1, anon. | abuseWaiii...Good inner thinking... =^-^= Good one! Write more! |
| SA-cHiCkStA 2001-06-06 ch 1, | abuseYO....powerful ritin' iz all i gotta say man...as kno...diz can really relate ta moi...n/e who...keep up da gud work....*plotz a plan ta get annie ** off*...hehehe.... |
| Whispering Night 2001-06-05 ch 1, | abuseWow. I really wish that I had the nerve to write something like this and shove it in everyone's faces who was making me mad. A lot of people suppress their anger because it's a "bad feeling" but I'm so glad that you can express it! |
| Dark Desires 2001-06-04 ch 1, | abuseWow... I wouldn't want to be whoever ** you off. I think good poetry is defined by how the emotions of the poem are transfered to the reader. In this case, this is not a good poem, it is a GREAT one. I'm feeling angry now too, and I was in a happy mood when I started reading. Keep up the exellent work, and never let anyone tell you otherwise:) |
| Fire's-insperation 2001-06-04 ch 1, | abuseI love it! I am in a not so great mood to so it helped kind of. |
| Nikki 2001-06-04 ch 1, anon. | abuseaww, i've felt this way with certain people too hun *hugz* very well written, and sorry for when u feel like this ~Nik |
| Stargazer (i dun wanna sign... 2001-06-04 ch 1, anon. | abusewhoaaaa, i feel your pain!! me so sowwy!! :( i liked it though |