|Reviews for Placebo|
| Supreme Gamesmaster Yddisac 5/20/13 . chapter 4
I adore everything about this story, except the pretentious narrator fellow at the top of each chapter. Oh, and the premise of the placebo-magic-thing. But the story itself - damn. You know how to develop characters fast and well, and make us care about them. You know how to develop a world without inelegantly dumping exposition on us at the beginning of a chapter - a skill I've lately noticed developed rather late even in professional fantasy; I'm reading a book that accomplishes what you've done by dumping all the worldbuilding information on the reader in the prologue.
Mind you I don't think this is professional quality; there are some awkward passages and dull sentences lying around, things like "He nodded behind him at the fire mage's shadow at the door and got up;" and the work generally lacks what I call the confidence of publishable writing. But I suffer the same problems, quite possibly to a greater extent, and what's more I couldn't achieve this level of suspense as I stand no matter how hard I tried.
Your narrative structure helps enormously with that sense of intrigue. I'm reminded of some book or another saying "Never take the reader where they want to go." You certainly never do, jumping around between Thalia and Ferrus at exactly the right times, disrupting the reader's view of the world (another advantage of your not-overly-definite worldbuilding) and never letting them settle on a particular paradigm for a whole chapter. I would do well, I think, to take a leaf from your book in the future in that regard.
In large part because of that wonderful structure, I am indeed curious to seed how your story will unfold. When I review again - and it is "when" - I'll try to provide more actual criticism; as it is, though, I think you write very well, certainly on a higher level than I do, and I'm eager to see where this story goes.
With all due respect,
Supreme Gamesmaster Yddisac
I'll be back. :O
| MakotoSensei 12/2/12 . chapter 6
So i read your other story "out of the blue", loved it,then saw the link to this and i must say you continue to astound me with your writing ability. Good luck at your University. And also it might be best to post this story on other fanfic sites to really get the reviews flowing in.
| IceQueen69 12/2/12 . chapter 6
yay update :D things are flowing at a nice and steady pace, keep up the good work. you have created some interesting characters here.
| Novae-rog-tala 10/24/12 . chapter 4
my reviews aren't showing up for some reason.
| SansaStark 10/21/12 . chapter 4
been leaving reviews but for some reason they will not show up. Awesome story so far.
| IceQueen69 10/19/12 . chapter 4
like where this is going, keep it up and you are doing just fine. I don't judge grammar mistakes very often unless their are a lot and your grammar is just fine.
| kadajclone100 10/10/12 . chapter 3
As always, your writing is superb