| Reviews for Quagmire |
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riverstardust 5/17/13 . chapter 1Interesting characters and story! "Photography? You mean you take pictures?" Kuromi asked. This part made me grin! Captain-obvious style! ) A few other parts did too(that was my favourite though!) |
DreamingVixen13 5/15/13 . chapter 1The storyline is interesting (if a bit typical of manga), and your writing style is intriguing and unique, easy to read but could be, in my objective opinion, a little more descriptive. You have a few mistakes in grammar, punctuation, and word usage; but it's always clear what you're trying to say. (That, I think as a writer, is the key point.) But a little proofreading goes a long way, and rechecking the linguistics of your story is a little like polishing it up: maybe only improving it a little, but it's noticeable and other people appreciate it. A lot. |
Jun Li Kanashii 5/10/13 . chapter 1I liked the way the characters were portrayed in this. Their personality contrasts made it fun to watch them interact. The line, "This isn't supposed to be an action story!" made me laugh. I liked the ending, it sounds exciting! |
Benehime 4/25/13 . chapter 4So I'm slowly making my way around stories I haven't reviewed in a while, and you're next on my list. :P Sorry for not reviewing in a while! I see you've improved quite a bit in terms of grammar. The only thing that kind felt unnatural was dialogue; I mean, it really isn't a big deal and I can easily shrug it off, just thought I'd throw that out there. Oh, and this may be just a pet peeve of mine, but I wouldn't recommend capitalizing sentences to denote yells or shouts. Use exclamation points, and then narrate the fact they're yelling. Looks and sounds a lot better. Other than that, you're doing really well! I think I said it before but it's a cute story in the making. Reference to fairy tail at the end! :D Anyway, I'll post something later... eventually lol. Keep it up! |
nchen13 3/31/13 . chapter 4FAIRY TAIL! :-) |
Y. S. Wong 3/28/13 . chapter 1Oho, quite a few references. Almost Edgeward-like. And it must be nice just having people falling over themselves trying to confess to you... Lol, silly Kuromi-chan, you don't run UPstairs when you're being chased! I like your style. It's a bit on the minimalistic side, which actually helps with ease of reading. Definitely gives it a light novel feel. The flow of your prose could use a little bit of work, but it's still solid. |
DaGreyHero 3/23/13 . chapter 12This is so funny! I think I busted my gut again. Keep up the good work and POWER TO THE OTAKUS! |
SoraAkihira 3/15/13 . chapter 12The story is finally making sense now in my jumbled-up brain, and I have so many questions to ask about this that I'm pretty sure the answers'll turn up at some point! Keep it up, though, because you're getting better! |
Guest 2/22/13 . chapter 11 This is awesome! Can't wait for more po! |
Snowlily 2/22/13 . chapter 11 Oh nice, is this reverse harem? |
CorycianAngel1944 2/18/13 . chapter 6This story's so cool! |
CorycianAngel1944 2/17/13 . chapter 2Nice. |
SoraAkihira 1/14/13 . chapter 9Well, to be completely honest, I'm confused... So this chapter is about Makoto two months prior to the start of this story, right? Um, I'd love to say I really liked how this chapter turned out, I'm more confused than anything now, so I'll just tell you to keep writing and do your best! |
SoraAkihira 12/26/12 . chapter 5Then there's Fairy Tail and Pokemon stupidity spreading all around, and not go mention Beelzebub! You'll keep working on this story, right? |
SoraAkihira 12/26/12 . chapter 4Alright, first things first... Okay, Nevermind about the dramatic effect. Seriously though, why Kuroko-chi? I'd expect Ahomine or Bakagami, but Kuro-chin acting like that, just the idea of it actually, makes me want to curl up into a ball and laugh my lungs out! KuroBasu notes aside, the story is enjoyable, but I have to admit that the grammar and spelling leaves something to be desired. I'm not trying to be rude, and I'm sorry if I came across and will come across as so, but do you have a beta reader? If not, it would be nice if you could check the work a bit. I can understand if you're a foreigner, and I can understand once again that I'm being rude. I like the story so far, of course, which is why I'm still reading! It's just... Pfft. Kuro-chin, seriously? |