|Reviews for The Beast and The Monster|
| Ink Flows Into Power 10/6/12 . chapter 3
Interesting...though I must say I thought that Gram was a baddie all along. However, it must be said that I think the Axe inviting Gram along so easily is a little hard to fathom.
That said, the action scene was great (if slightly short) and the sixth sense of Axe is something to ponder. This story continues to slowly build up a series of interesting layers and I can't wait to see what goes on next
| Ink Flows Into Power 10/6/12 . chapter 2
There is two grammatical errors in this chapter:
"easily; it a monster"
" If you can help it, attack them separately".
Aside from that, I was interested to find out a little more about Axe, and I like the portrayal of him wielding such an infamous weapon as the Lochaber, and not just because I am Scottish! I feel that the Lochaber is synonymous with an executioner which happens to be very appropriate for Axe.
I liked the bravery of Axe and how he immediately jumped to the position of authority upon arrival. However, I do have a slight problem with how he is described - you never discuss his feelings. No annoyance, no happiness, nothing. This could be a conscious effort to keep him mysterious, but it gives off the impression that you don't like discussing emotions. I would like to know more about how he feels in certain situations, what makes him tick.
Other than that, I enjoyed this chapter immensely and particularly like the humour towards the end! Well done!
| Ink Flows Into Power 10/4/12 . chapter 1
Interesting start, it left me wondering whether or not Axe is truly mad or just "gifted". He gives of many signs of madness, but by the same token, he seems to be dead on in that he was needed in the Badlands. He was cleverly characterised and I definitely want to know more about him.
However, there are a couple of flaws in how this was written: The name badlands is very basic and rather cliched. I can see why you chose it - it sounds like a local slang - but it has been over-used rather a lot. This makes it sound almost like a child's terror as opposed to the sinister edge I feel that you are trying to create. Try to change it to something more inventive as this will make it unique and thus more scary.
My other real criticism is that if the thing/things that destroyed the outpost was so powerful and terrifying I find it hard to believe that an old merchant would be keen to approach. The slightly mad Axe might, but an older civilian is kind of pushing it. However, this could be resolved by introducing a reason for his bravery (I am unsure if you did this in later chapters) such as perhaps a nocturnal evil or the person having family in the outpost.
Overall, very well-written and inventive and I will be reading the rest avidly over time. Well done and keep up the good work!
| cd11 10/3/12 . chapter 5
A very good tale.