well written mate :-)
Maybe if you could put up a bit more of her emotions and her thoughts ,it would be a more expressfull . Her aspirations,dreams,hopes are good places which you could highlight more.
Cheers.

umm...if she doesn't reallyy have much interestt in the videoo game u may as well not mention the namee...it makes u sound a littlee too...informedd i think...?

I like it. It's pretty and personal without being pretentious. If I had an account I'd favorite. Thumbs up. ")

Try to make it flow a bit smoother...