Nobody will respect you until you respect yourself. Don't care what other people think, and people will think higher of you. Care about what other people think, and people will think lower than you. Simple and proven though my experience EVERY DAY TO THIS DAY.

Humans tend to fill roles in life, so while it may seem "phony," or "unfitting," or "unusual," to walk the halls with your back straight, utterly confident, thinking that you're better than everyone you see, you need to consciously do it, and project it through body language. What comes out of your mouth needs to be confident in what it's saying, yet not AS ARROGANT as what your mind should be thinking how PERFECT what you're saying is. That's what should be going on. Consciously fill this role.

You think filling roles is too untrue to yourself? We all do it. You're doing it right now. You think you're the role of subordinate. WHY are you subordinate? Tell me.. What do they do that you couldn't do?

It's all in the MIND. EVERYTHING is in the MIND. All things that you perceive is in the MIND. Understand that in order to know that YOUR ROLE IS IN THE MIND.

Some scientists push the view that NOTHING EXISTS UNLESS IT'S OBSERVED. You get where I'm getting at? It's easy:

STEP 1: ISOLATION

In ISOLATION, think how much better you are than everyone else. Think why. Imagine all the dumb things everyone has said, and make fun of it. LISTEN TO COCKY UPBEAT MUSIC, like Hip Hop, Dubstep, Rock, etc. These are SPECIFICALLY made for this! It's Phony to you...it's too cocky...It makes no sense...It's ridiculous...it's inappropriate...PUSH IT ALL TO THE SIDE.

It's too cocky? YOU NEED TO BE COCKY
It makes no sense? IT SHOULDN'T, YOU THINK "SENSE" IS THAT YOU'RE A SUBORDINATE.
It's inappropriate? SUBJECTIVE

STEP 2: TAKE IT PUBLIC

10/10 times, you will ACT less cockier than you THINK you are, SO MAKE SURE YOU WORK ON THE MENTAL IN ISOLATION

Wow This is beautiful and very heart-wreaking. If this is true, I'm sorry. If this is fictional, you're really talented.

OMG i really like this story! Your style of writing is very unique! Please post more! :)

This reminds me of The Perks of Being a Wallflower.
Nice Job :)

That is a very touching letter. Sounds similar to me except I do not have any sort of relationship. I'm bi and idk what to do really. I hope this works out for you :)
DeWolfe3