|Reviews for avalanche and braille|
| killMeN0w 5/7/13 . chapter 13
I could really relate to this O_o Freakishly so. This was cool c:
| tolerate 3/22/13 . chapter 9
Beautiful lines. It's like these two people are the same, well, almost the same, and there's just that little bit of difference when it comes to breaking things. The person wants to break themselves and the other wants to break something else.
| punctured.lungs 3/3/13 . chapter 9
incredible. it breaks my heart because i've been there.
| punctured.lungs 2/12/13 . chapter 8
i wish i had better words to explain how much i love this. i don't even know why i do - i mean, there's the fact that you're an amazing writer, of course. but something about this piece in particular speaks to me, and i can't figure out what it is. i don't know if it's because of the last stanza, which i relate to ridiculously, or the "i am so sorry/ i did not visit/ or understand/ your voice over/ the phone" because that's standing out right now too, or if it's just that everything is amplified by lack of sleep.
whatever it is, amazingamazing. i love it.
| PiratePrincessSarah 1/9/13 . chapter 1
Nice! I love it, it paints a picture in my mind!
:3 XD :D ;D :)
| Angel from the Sea 1/6/13 . chapter 6
Poetry is an explanation of an emotional experience and you write beautifully.
I love this.
| Angel from the Sea 1/6/13 . chapter 3
She'd rather be crazy than boring. that is a beautiful thought, and I thank you for sharing this, and anything you've ever written with me. It is gorgeous, mesmerizing.
| punctured.lungs 12/27/12 . chapter 5
i like this, but i have a minor suggestion. using the word "ghosts" twice is a bit repetitive. i think it'd be slightly improved if you changed the last line to "there are none" or something like that. other than that, amazing, especially for middle of the night.
looking forward to another update :)
| punctured.lungs 12/27/12 . chapter 4
i wish i could favorite this poem individually. perfect.
| crocodile 12/14/12 . chapter 3
this is really sad but really interesting. i like the usage of days, especially "on thursday, she paints herself dying in technicolour." great imagery.
| punctured.lungs 12/11/12 . chapter 2
i love this. such a great opening.
i don't know. i haven't got much to say. i just can't bring myself to stop reading, even though maybe i should, because i feel like you're writing about me. or something. i don't know.
| TheGlycoprotein 12/11/12 . chapter 3
... this is so beautifully tragic. I can relate oh so well, so I cried.
Great work, as always. Keep them coming.
| Lolitroy 12/5/12 . chapter 1
Umm I really didn't understand the poem -.-' though I could guide myself through the imagery. I just hope it isn't symbolism or anything cuz then I'm totally lost O.O
But for what I could get through my thick head, it was nice :)
| fallenshadow42 10/27/12 . chapter 1
i like it
| Small Wings Flying 10/6/12 . chapter 1
Nice images. Vanilla is something I'd consider a semi-natural flavour, so stating it as artificial brings about a nice contrast. And the same with lukewarm coffee, knowing it should taste better while it's hot. Same with the brown bubbles; it gives an image of dirtiness as they're normally blue and sparkling and pure. And the sunburns instead of sun...beautifully built up, getting stronger by the image.
Funny you use a chemical base like acrylic. Again, leans towards that artificiality.
I see you haven't used any capitals, and that works fine for the most part with the slow damper-style rhythm, but perhaps that last line, a firmer one, should at least have a capital 'I'? Or is you're trying to make the "i" inconsequential as a defined person. The only other thing is this:
[lukewarm coffee in a backseat cupholder
and spilled out edges
of wax paper.] - to me, it would make more sense if you either split the first line or combined the second with the third. The structure of both is similar, so it doesn't make sense to me to split one and not the other.
But nice poem.