|Reviews for Isea: A tale of faeries|
| Kay Iscah 12/3/12 . chapter 2
You don't need to repost the first chapter in the second chapter. It'll read much better if you don't. Take the note that you'll write more later out too.
Glad to see you switched to "shepherd" in the new part, but I'd highly recommend editing the summary with the same correction.
Again, would really like descriptions of people other than Celestine. What does Tristan look like? Or the shepherd boy, Dinadan? Even a vague description would be nice.
It does seem a little odd that Tristan would ask the princess if the king was her father, particularly if they're at her castle. I do like the King's name and title though.
Given the romantic tone of the story, I might suggest that "six months later" could be described in a more visual or viceral sense. Like "Winter turned to summer. The icy branches grew fresh green leaves and tempting fruit." ...unless of course it's a kingdom of prepetual winter...
| Kay Iscah 12/2/12 . chapter 1
The idea is certainly interesting. (I'm following, and this is my first story to follow on this site thus far.)
Little bumpy on the grammar, three mistakes in the description alone. It's "shepherd" not sheppard (followed by a comma as it's a compound sentence) and "perilous" not perilus. The chapter itself has few mispellings, but there are commas in the wrong places. I think the phrase is "for heaven's sake".
Might benefit from a little more description, but that's really a stylistic choice...and depends on whether there any importance to certain characters or locations. If the queen, Balen, or Blytha is going to show up again, it would be nice to have an idea of what they look like.