A few grammar mistakes here and there but I dont think im one too complain with my terrible grammar anyway awesome story first person point of view seems like it's get more common by the second even I have writing a first person story

Amazing

Ooooh interesting!

Loved it!

A new chapter! You update really fast.

There were some errors this time that just stuck with me. For instance, was 'ally' meant to be 'alley'? Your prose within the story was a little shaky since it kind of jumped to scene like the beginning. Towards the end it got better.

Despite that, I loved some of your description. It was really good. Just remember to proofread before you post anything. I hoped this helped!

Now I'm hooked! I want to know who this girl is! o.o;;

The only mistake I can see that pops out at you is this:

Is it something like love at first sit, which most girls believe it is?
Should be - Is it something like love at first [sight], which most girls believe it is? (I'm not really picky when it comes to mistakes of any kind but I just wanted to point it out)

Other than that I enjoyed the beginning and I can't wait for the next chapter :)

Sounds interesting!