This was good ! lol first of all, i love the title and i could create my version of what the "Queen of Queens" looked like. your description was amazing. i don't think there's anything that needs to be added or taken out, you pretty much told the story like it was. maybe if you wanted to have the readers be more sympathetic for the woman as she meets her fate in the end, you could add some traits or behaviors or even thoughts, something along that, so the ending can make them feel for her. Because that death would be pretty horrific and tragic. its a great story, whether you add the things or not, your good :)