That was awesome! I feel so much better my friend. Such feeeeeeels!

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO Don't end it there! Sequel! Sequel!

Yeah, I admit that I still have a lot of editing to do...sorry that the first draft is a bit rough...but I promise when I repost the chapters that they'll be a little more smooth

With some editing, this looks very promising. There are a few simple errors here and there in every chapter (especially mixing up character's names). Might want to add an introduction for Jasper. Ky and Stella know Jasper's name, but he never introduced himself to them (they just instantly know his name?)

You have a great idea here. With some polishing, filling-out and editing, it will make a great novel for teens.

Good story but sometimes it gets hard to follow. I think that you mixed up Paige and Stellas name in one chapter and few others small things that had me re-read parts but really good. I like the story and the fact it does not completely centre in on the possible romance between Stella and Jasper. Nothing roll-your-eyes-sappy and you are quite a good writer.
Keep writing :)

I see so many Bible references here! That makes me so happy! And the cliff-hanger! Nooooooooooooooooooo...

Gah, I wish I could come up with twists like this! Someone really needs to make this into a movie!

AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH! Such a good story! Someone needs to turn this into a movie!

Wow, this is really good! I love the idea, and you're a great writer. I love how you've given new names to things, like "chatty" instead of telephone. Keep writing!

I love the way that there's a little bit of romantic mush, just to show that they care for each other and such, because if not then Jasper would still hate Stella, and they wouldn't be really round characters. This is a great story, thus far! :)

Cliff-hanger... Noooooooooooooooooooo... (But the story/suspense/everything is great)

It's amazing, it's like Jeopardy-Hunger Games-Future-Amazingness!

Yes! I do the metaphorical things that I think are cool and then no one ever notices them, too! Oh my gosh, I do that all the time!
And the story is still amazing, by the way. :)

I think it's great! I love how it has the whole set in the future thing, and it's completely possible (which is cool yet scary) and it reminds me a little of the Hunger Games, but at the same time it's nothing like it, so it doesn't feel like I'm reading the same story, which is great!

This is your first!? Wow, that's really good... (I love leaving cliff-hangers, too; they're just so fun to write)