You were in a bad mood when you wrote this? Plausible excuse, really. See, you have a concise, workable idea that can be transformed to poetry- embodied in your last two lines. Yet, you destroy it with your way of expressing words. First, your rhymes are rather insecure and cliche, as if "rest" and "best" have never been expounded together. THis ruins your poem right off for the reader. Your rhythm is nonexistant, sadly. And the use of the word "Cuz" auments the air of an immature writer. I apologize if this writing is your way of expressing yourself, which it very well may be considering it isn't poetry.

hiya! well done, i like it, but you could remember the good day, but i s'pose it'd be better living it (obv.!) anyways...i looked at your art thingy page and the fearie lady drawing is very good! well done with both the poem and your art! cya =)

Ok, that is just plain depressing!!
But good. *grrrr*

Sailor Lita

I liked this poem,you make a really good point.

That is so true! I hate admitting it, but you make a great point, and you do it with great style too.