Wow. Absolutely wonderful. I wish i could write like this, i do SO wish that i could.It's so grea. Xhara seems like the type of hero who can conquer all, in a sense, if you know what I mean. I really like the end of this chapter. Slightly foreshadowing. It's very good. Keep it up!

~Wings~

PS: If you want (actually, i'm pleading) please review my story. I've been working on it awhile now and reviews are beginning to slow down. Hopefully i'm not losing my touch. Review would be GREATLY appreciated

I wonder what has made Kien so sad? But excellent description of the empress herself, and of her relationship to the people. Throughout the chapter you could feel how much she is adored. Hmm, but if you need inspiration to continue, here's an idea...*whispers it to you* I don't want these other kids to see! Ask me about it over IM ;)

Very good, I just hope this being last on your postings list doesn't entail that you have stopped writing and adding to it. If you have, pretty please, just for me and your other loyal fans, write more. It is like 12:00 am here though, so I really shouldn't read any of your other stuff right now, but knowing me, I might.

I forgot to ask last review why exactly Xhara had been sleeping next to or with Fyar?
This was good, and I hope this doesn't sound rude, but you described someone's looks and definitely gave me a better idea of what I was supposed to see from your writing. In the other chapters, I was pretty much going by vague images. Your writing is getting better with each chapter.

Ahhh...too short, still good though.

Your names for characters and places are extremely creative and unique. I am liking this lot so far, and if all of your writing is like this, I have alot of reading to do.

I like Xhara, a woman who knows what she wants, and doesn't let anyone try to trick her. She doesn't play the cutesy blonde act that so many women do nowadays. Yet again, I request that you describe the characters' physical appearances if you would be so kind. Good job.

Pretty good so far. You underestimate yourself, you are perfectly capable of writing well-thought and sensible beginnins to your stories. I would like if you would describe Xhara's physical attributes, and what her tent held, its furniture, measurements, etc. Also, how do you pronounce her name? If I tell my friends about this, and have to say Xhara as X Hair ah, I will be thoroughly embarrassed if it is wrong.

I love the way there's a feeling of something on the verge of overboiling all the way through.

Interesing. Very Intriging... Some very witty lines here to. I love the way you end with a sort of hint of action to come, but not quite a cliffhanger. Something far more subtle, but just as effective.

There could be a little bit more detail about the war/battle going on offscene, since she's in charge, it'd be on her mind constantly.

Adore the way you open with the triple conflict, that of the battlefield, that with to the poor messenger and that within herself. It's a compelling beginning. Really.
Offhand, Orientals don't put much weight on women... most like to keep them mewed up at home with half a dozen kids and bound feet.

hehehehe. you go girl. this will be interesting, the two cousins competing for the same lady, who's about to get her head chopped of because she won a battle. hmmmmm, i can't wait to see how this'll turn out! keep it up!

Heehee. That's what you get for fawning too much, Fyar and Setir. Muaaa!!
I like Xhara's strong character.

Great tension there, dude. I remember that you emailed me to tell me that you updated this... quite a while ago, but you didn't put the name of the fic, so I couldn't find it. However, after all this time, I remembered the fic - I recognised the title and summary, etc. That means that it must be good, for it to stick out in my mind after so long. (Considering that I read hundreds of stories on Ffnet and only remember a few).

Sweet. You've got me interested. This is good.

Sunny Gurl (already forgot the capitilization) here. Nice, the e-mail was a good idea ^_^ Anyway, really interesting, working well. Write on!