Oh! I have to ask you, have you read any of Mercedes Lackey's books? If you haven't then I have to share with you.
*story telling pose*
"Shadow-Lover, from the Shadows made
Lead me into Shadow once again.
Where you lead I cannot be afraid,
For with you I shall come home again-
In your arms I shall not fear the night.
Shadow-Lover, lead me to the light."
The Lover is Death. *sniffles* God I love that song, pity it isn't mine.

You picked a great, great concept that deserves more than you give it here. Revisit this idea, but give it the time and glory and quiet melancholia it should have. This has the potential to be great, but with work. Ditch the awkward rhyming.

Beautiful. Simply beautiful. And very courageous, in its own way.

'The only thing certain in life is death and taxes.'

- Ben Franklin

very pretty, i like it. my grandmother recently passed away and it makes me think that she might feel that way also. :)