A/N: This was a bit of a 'stream of consciousness' story. I have no idea really how clear it will be.. it's not even very clear to me, but I don't know how to make the words portray it any better. It's relatively short though... it's not something I expect to happen to me by a long shot, but it's an interesting idea to explore... how it would be dealt with. Also, my character Xenofen (he's a fav of mine!) appears in this story. YAY! Please enjoy! ^.^

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When and where do you encounter a being that is willing to intervene for you in the vast web of the universe.. for a price. I suppose it's a halfway random choice, a need arises, and.. well...

A being with that much power.. why does he need MY help? I'm not sure. As things stand, I'm nothing but a frustrated soul trapped in a life as a human on Earth in a less than optimal century. I'd done my share of interacting with beings not confined to the physical realm. Perhaps it was the waves of longing for my old self. That which I remembered being and living.. but only vaguely.. that mindstate was nearly lost to me, as I now lived in the mind and body of a human. It was painful.

But I found a way out. Pure luck perhaps.. I'd always known him in the corner of my mind, but when he actually came, he was more than I had imagined. Larger, stronger.. darker.. even I could feel the chaotic power that seethed behind his brilliant blue eyes, coiled around his sharp glinting claws. I might've expected a being to ask my permission first, to allow me time to decide.. had I realized it then, I might've decided against it, knowing that such disruption of my soul's own path was NOT a beneficial thing no matter how it might seem to me at that time. But Xenofen held little respect for karmic law, and as I was later to learn, he was an expert at rebounding it to where he wanted it to go.

What was my choice, then? I had been given a job offer. Some alter plane, alter reality.. a group of beings (were they human? they looked it) struggling to eke out an existence in a hostile world. They needed protection and assistance. Was Xenofen dedicated to their cause?

Hardly. They'd appealed to him, and as he does, he felt a whim, and acted on it. He would break down the life I was living now, free my soul, and rebuild a place and life for it in the form I had once held, based on my superconscious memory. Be a Dragon again. Fly again. This was what he offered me.. in returning for leaving everything I knew behind, and possibly disrupting my karmic path. This was a concern for me, and I wanted time to think about it.. but Xenofen mentioned icily that if I wasn't interested, he'd only find someone else. I'm afraid the human got the better of me. I feared losing this chance forever. The devil's temptation perhaps. Though in more of a symbolic sense.. one's own wishes prevailing instead of dedication to balance and karma. I had a life here, of sorts.. I was writing stories, creating artwork, learning to play my fiddle.. I had friends, I had attachments, I had emotions, I had many things tying me here. And would I abandon the rest of my path here for a chance to become what I once was? What was the worst that could happen? I'd have to come back one day. And I'd never get another chance like this.

Yes.

I'll go.

I don't have recollection, really, of what happened while my very existence was being broken down. I felt the power behind what was happening. Xenofen could easily obliterate me down to a spiritual level and change me so my soul couldn't even be recognized for what it had been, but he had something he was doing, and he did it. He did it and he wished me good luck. Then he was gone.

A bright light burned through my gaze, and I couldn't see for a long moment. The remnants of my human consciousness and fear welled up in my mind, and I struggled to move, but my limbs slapped against soft ground uselessly. I felt the pull and lift of muscles that weren't there before, I felt lighter, quicker, more flexible. And best of all, I felt what was AROUND me. This was a world much like Earth, as I could easily see when I opened my eyes. But I didn't need my eyes open to see it far better than I ever had before. It was omnipresent to me, existing in a state of being where I could see, feel, sense, and reach out and touch, every line and branch of energy, the deep currents that ran through, below, and above the land.. it was exhilirating. The cobwebs of emotion and confusion cleared themselves from my mind, and I only saw everything around me.. saw it how I'd never seen it. I saw how it worked and flowed together, I noted instantly the imperfections, and I felt a great peace and contentment settling over me. I felt as if I could melt into the landscape, become a part of it, meld with the grass and the trees, the sky and the earth, flow along with that energy, and work with it, watch it grow and flux into a shining river that rushed through my mind.

But I had a job to do. I started to get up, and was exhilirated by the realization that I had to focus on staying solidly in and upon this level of whatever world this was. I could see beyond this world, see the lines that stretched past it into the astral levels and higher. And I could move along them. The very comfort my mind felt with them assured that I could.. I was not
confined to this physical world as I had been when I was human. Now.. I focused my attention a little more, and climbed easily to my feet. This body.. this.. what I was now. It was me, more truely than the human ever had been... I could see and feel my own shining claws, ebony-scaled hands, I could turn my head and see the light blue, gauzy expanse of an arched wing.. see my
tail whipping back and forth and coiling. And yet it was not a body in a physical sense but the shape and form of who I was. I turned, and found that neither was my movement confined entirely to this realm even as I was in it. It was subtle, but it made my motion and forward progress much easier, and quicker. I trotted across the grass, feeling it against my scales but feeling its energy against my own far more profoundly.

This was what I'd been missing in the suffocating dark box of being human. Yet I still REMEMBERED being human.. not quite as clearly, perhaps.. there was a clear-cut image of my memories, and although the fog of my old human mind was still in place enough for me to be able to understand them, it was becoming less so already. I felt the barest tinge of remorse for the stories and ideas I'd left behind for new ones. I felt a residual spike of pain from the emotions responsible for my attachment to people I was close to in that life. But although these things tried to command my attention, they were fading rapidly in the scope of my
new mind and perception. They were not important to who I was now, no; they were important to who I had been... but I was different now. Different and unbelievably more content. I had a purpose here, and a job to do.. although a moment of reflection told me I was not obligated by anyone but myself. Xenofen was gone. He had done what he'd come to do and left.. and I felt no ties or duty to the people who needed protection here. It was entirely up to me.

But I could feel the imperfections that fractured this world in the finest strands of energy that permeated it. And I wanted to fix it, wanted to pull it back to a state of balance and peace. And this, ultimately, was what ended up keeping me here. I'd been brought here to fulfill a purpose, and it was a purpose that kept me here in the face of my terrible karmic disobediance. I had to make this purpose more important than the unknown one which I had left.. the fact was, I still REMEMBERED being human.. and this was a taint on what otherwise would have been a purely draconic mind, a high spiritual state, and a committing purpose to things wildly different from nearly everything that had been important to the human mind. The taint was there... I still remembered.

And this would, one day, prove a terrible curse to me..