I don’t know if I can feel anymore; it’s like a cold has gripped my heart. My children all have separate lives while I wallow away like a widow.

            My husband never sleeps but he always holds me. I love him so much. He cradles our children like they’re the precious gems that I wear on my ears; I know he loves them as much as I do.

            I’m cradled by warmth on all side, two sets of arms wrapped around my waist, two separate breaths whispering at my hair. Our children sleep in a different room, a different house for this night.

            The pain is like a knife. Sometimes I curse myself for being so very weak while other times I just sit there, like a doll. My hair is thinner then ever; I can feel myself age. Love has warn away what might have been a lasting life. Instead…

            His fingers are coarse as they brush against my cheek and I can feel his fingertips tangle in the curls of my hair. It looks like blood against his fingers, I know. He chuckles, strong arms pulling me tightly against him. He’s so hard, so muscular, against me. I’m too ‘dainty’ for my own good, especially when pregnant.

            He turns in his sleep, one arm dangling around my waist. I push my hand into his comfortably, intertwining our fingers together while my head rests on our bookworms stomach. He also shifts as he sleeps, securing his arms around our fox, pulling himself closer and squishing me in the process. Strength is seeping into me. I am so in love.

            I’m fading away and I can’t find the strength to care. Maybe it’s the way things are supposed to be; maybe I was meant to be alone. I loved him more then I loved myself and any world in any way. For a long, long while he was the only reason for coming back, for being alive once more. It was frightening, how much someone can depend on another.

                                                            ~*~*~

            Told from my perspective on Kushi, Mary and Tamas relationships, respectively. That’s…about it.