Hey! Please review me and tell me what this is like. Its not very good because its only a first draft and I wrote it when I was 10.Please tell me what you think.

Jaymie thought she was normal, but when she and JJ stumble upon a dark room, they are catapulted into an icy, evil world. They meet the terrified Children of the Darkness, and at the centre of their terror, the Master.

LIGHT

Chapter One              

THE OLD WADE HOUSE

It was a dark, stormy night out in the lonely countryside of Desmond Hill. Around midnight, Lesley Wade, the daughter of the famous authoress Kim Wade, awoke. She squinted around her shadowy room and sat up to see what had awoken her.

“Who’s there?” she asked the silent darkness, “Show yourself.” Out of the corner of her eye she saw a crumpled shadow move closer to her.

“Donny? Is that you? This isn’t funny!” It was very like her brother to pull a prank like this but somehow Lesley didn’t think that it was him in her room watching her. The crumpled shadow, shuffled still closer.

“Donny?” She gasped, panic creeping into her voice, and crawled to the end of her bed farthest away from the unknown thing creeping, shuffling closer to her. Lesley slowly pulled her duvet around her and tried not to breath as the shuffling stopped and the thing halted at the edge of her bed. Then it began. The silence was broken by an eerie, evil crackle of a laugh and Lesley’s bedroom disappeared in a whirl of dizziness in front of her terrified eyes, and then it was over. But Lesley Wade was no more.

                        

“The old Wade house! Wow!” exclaimed JJ one cold Wednesday morning as he walked up the path to school with his best friend Jaymie.

“I know! This holiday is going to be a blast!” She said, pulling out a picture of the old Wade house and giving it to JJ. “And dads gunna ask your mum if you can come too!”

“No way! Your dads the best”

“I know.”

              It was the last day of term for the year 8 students of Desmond Hill High School. All the teachers gave up teaching them at the start of the week as they were all too excited to work. The old Wade house was the usual pick for dares because of its eerie past. As the story goes, a famous authoress had lived there with her son and daughter but her daughter mysteriously disappeared one stormy night. Her brother, Donny, was sent to a mental hospital because he claimed an evil being had entered the house and taken his sister. The reason for her mysterious disappearance is still unknown.

              JJ and Jaymie sat down at a two-seat table, still in deep conversation about the old Wade house. Jaymie was going to spend the week at the dilapidated house as part of a try-out of a new tourist idea. She had asked her dad to take JJ along too. JJ was her best friend and they went everywhere and did everything together. As they chatted about the mystery of the house another person decided to enter the conversation.

“The old Wade house? Are you sure you can handle it? What with its horrible past?” sneered Faye, their worst enemy in the school.

“Oh push off Faye. It’s eerie past doesn’t scare us!” retorted JJ with Jaymie nodding her head by his side.

“Oh doesn’t it? Well we’ll see about that,” Faye said and strutted back to her place in her high heels and mini skirt making sure she took a detour around some boys’ tables.

“What did she mean ‘we’ll see about that’?” asked Jaymie, turning away from Faye with a look of dislike on her face.

“I don’t know. But you know what Faye’s like, says anything to get up our noses.” replied JJ and they got out their books and began to draw.

              The bell finally rang for the end of school and the Easter holidays began. Jaymie and JJ ran all the way down the winding path to Jaymie’s house.

“So, what’s your answer?” panted Jaymie as she hurtled round the door and came to an immediate halt in front of her dad, closely followed by JJ.

“What? Oh! Right.” Her dad rummaged around in his bag for a couple of minutes and then pulled out a small piece of paper. “Your ticket JJ.”

“YES!!” they cried together and jumped around the kitchen and into the garden until they were exhausted and flopped onto the grass. The afternoon sun beat down on them in a crystal blue sky as they lay on the grass chatting excitedly. In 4 hours time they would be standing outside the old house and their creepy adventure would begin.

IN THE DARKNESS

Lesley opened her eyes. It was black all around so she couldn’t see a thing. There was a piercing silence apart from her quivering breath. She tried to scream but no sound would come out.

“Where am I?” she thought and to her surprise a boys voice answered.

“You’re in the darkness Lesley. You can’t get out.”

“What? How do you know my name?”

“Oh, we all know your name Lesley. That’s ‘cause you’re the deliverer.”

“The what? Don’t be absurd. I’m no deliverer! I haven’t got anything!”

“You are! And it’s what you bring in 25 years to us. You will bring the Light bearer who will save us.” Lesley pinched herself to make sure she wasn’t dreaming. It hurt. She wasn’t dreaming this weird conversation.

“Well, how am I supposed to do that?”

“Oh, you’ll find a way.” he assured her. Lesley shook her head in disbelief. This isn’t happening she told herself. Suddenly there was a cacophony of shrieking. Lesley heard lots of feet running this way and that. She heard the evil laugh fill the darkness and a hand grab her. She squealed and tugged away but the boy whispered in her ear

“Come, hurry!” and she let herself be led away. Some girls were sobbing behind her and other children yelling for help.

“This place is full of terror” she thought, “I’m going to help them! I’ll bring the Light Bearer.” She lifted her head up slightly as they came to a dull grey light. The boy pulled her down in a corner. She looked around herself. Girls and boys no older than 13 and no younger than 5 sat hunched up all around the side of this room. 3 more children came in and a boy with short black hair hit a red button. All the children sighed with relief and shuffled into the middle. The boy pulled Lesley forward and she joined the circle.

“That was a close one.” Said the boy with the black hair.

“Yeah He’s getting stronger every shimmer and ice!” cried a girl the same age as Lesley.

“Who’s the ‘He’ you speak of?” she asked the group. They all turned and stared at her, looking her up and down. Eventually an older boy spoke.

“He is the ruler of this place. He holds us here.”

“Can’t you stop him?”

“No,” said another girl, “Only the Light Bearer can do that and we’ve got another 25 years to hide until she can.”

“Anyway, who the hell are you?” asked the older boy.

“Guys, guys! D’you know who you’re speakin’ to?” said the boy who had brought her in.

“If I knew I wouldn’t be askin’ would I Martin?!”

“I know who she is Tobe. She’s the Deliverer.” A tall girl of 12 stood up. She had long brown hair and a face that shone like silver.

“Oh the Deliverer eh?” Tobe said mockingly, “And how you gonna fetch our light bearer then?”

“Don’t answer that Lesley, he’ll only twist it and turn it against you somehow.” Said the tall girl. Tobe got very angry.

“You’re her protector then are ya? How great! Amy the Protector!” snarled Tobe menacingly.

“Back off Tobe! Come on Amy we need to talk to Lesley.” commanded Martin. Martin and Amy whisked her away down a passage and into another grey room. It had a few chairs and some blankets on the hard floor. They sat her down on a chair and pulled theirs closer.

“Don’t mind Tobe. He’s not that bad really.” Amy told her soothingly. Martin gave Amy a look like ‘yeah right!’ and then said,

“I bet there’s a lot of things you want know. Well, ask us anything you want. We know all of it.”

There were a million questions buzzing around Lesley’s head, but she couldn’t ask them all and chose the most important.

“How did this start? And what’s shimmer and ice?” She asked.

“We’re always in darkness and so don’t know if it’s day or night. So we’ve made our own. The master’s here for half a day, we reckon, and it’s ice cold and so that part is ice. When he’s gone the darkness shimmers and that’s our shimmers bit.

                We were the first of the new Master’s victims. I say new master because this has been going on for generations but a Light Bearer comes every generation and frees the victims but no Light Bearer has ever managed to kill a Master forever. So the Masters come back again and again using different bodies. We reckon that they gradually take over the souls of different people and whilst they are asleep he leaves their bodies and comes down here, to the darkness returning to hide in his host during the shimmer time.

              So far, every Light Bearer has been a teenager of 16 to 19 but this time it’s a child of 12. That’s why Tobe is so doubtful. I mean how can a 12 year old save us and defeat the darkness! It can’t be done!” cried Martin.

“But they wouldn’t choose her if she wasn’t right or powerful enough would they?” said Amy.

“Urm, whose the they?” asked Lesley

“They are the Protectors. They put the power in the foetus of a child who they see will be able to control it. But they can’t come down themselves. Nobody knows why, and then nobody knows what they are either. We just know that they’re the Protectors.” Another question was eager to get out but she didn’t want to seem rude. Somehow Amy saw what she was thinking and laughed.

“Don’t worry it’s not rude. We know all this because we are the messengers. When we close our eyes, if they want to tell us something we would see a beautiful light and a soft voice that is just as beautiful would tell us something. That’s how we know.”

“Why are all the kids here from 5 to 13?” asked Lesley.

“That’s because teenagers have more fight in them than we do. He feeds on fear you see and teenagers block it out and so he can’t feed. That’s why all Light Bearers have been older teenagers, until now.”

Lesley grinned as she took it all in and grinned even more as she came up with an idea. An idea of how to get to the Light Bearer.

Twenty-Five years later, Lesley, Tobe, Martin and Amy hid behind a rock. They were waiting for the Master to show up. The darkness was shimmering but suddenly turned icy cold. The group of four shivered and gulped.

“Take me through this again. How are we getting to the Light Bearer?” asked Tobe as he sat back.

“I’ve figured out that the Master only comes down when his host is asleep, meaning it must be night in the real world.” She explained.

“So…”

“So, if he can get down here, there must be a way up. If we go up and find the Light Bearer while she’s dreaming, then we can talk to her.” Lesley continued. Tobe nodded but confusion was seen on his face.

“He’s coming this way, hide!” Amy hissed, throwing herself into the shadows. The Master glided by and an icy air passed over them. They felt a chill run down their spines and they crept away, towards the World Door. Something ahead shone silver. They stared in awe at the rectangular silver door and all nodded. Lesley stepped forward and stood under the silver door, closing her eyes. In a flash of light she was gone, taken into a light and calm world of dreams. She sighed and looked around. It was pink and like a world of clouds, warm and happy. She thought of the Light Bearer and a name popped up in her mind. Jaymie. As she thought this name, she was sent into Jaymie’s dreams. Her dreams were not like the world of dreams; they were like being in the darkness. She heard voices pleading for mercy and help. Shaking her head she began to speak.

“Help Jaymie. Come with me Jaymie…”

THE ROOM

After the short bus journey and a bit of walking they soon arrived at the isolated house. They walked through the great iron gates and passed the beaten trees and broken statues. The enormous house was worn out and crumpled. JJ and Jaymie thought it looked like it would collapse if a bee landed on it.

“It must have been very grand in its time,” said Jaymie’s Dad. They all gaped at the once magnificent house for a few more minutes and then Ray, Jamie’s dad, opened the huge oak doors and walked in. Jaymie and JJ were expecting beautiful varnished floors and expensive paintings. But they got a shock. There were hundreds of silvery cobwebs on the banisters and in every corner, it was infested with some sort of beetle that neither JJ nor Jaymie had ever seen before. To them it was a mess. But Ray thought other wise.

“Isn’t it great! So spooky! The tourists will love it!” he exclaimed, rubbing his big hands together and smiling.

“Ray, I don’t want to be rude or anything, but…it’s a mess!” cried JJ, jumping over a swarm of the unknown beetles. Jaymie wasn’t so careful and squashed them all.

“UURRR! DAD! I’ve got squashed beetles all over my trainers! DAD!” yelled Jaymie, but her dad was already in the next room. JJ grabbed her arm and pulled her into the next room. When they both looked up they both gasped.

“DAD! NO! WHY ARE THEY HERE?” complained Jaymie.

“Jaymie! Don’t be so rude. This is Mr and Mrs Rubarb and their daughter.”

“I believe you know my daughter,” said Mrs Rubarb. There, standing next to Mrs Rubarb, was Faye. She looked exactly like her mother. Tall, skinny, black, straight hair and, of course, the pointed nose. They both wore tiny skirts, short tops and thick splashes of make up all over their faces. JJ and Jaymie thought they looked like witches in modern dress.

              Faye smiled a snobbish smile, flicked back her shiny hair and strutted into the next room.

“She’s going to make our life hell!” whispered JJ as he and Jaymie investigated the rest of the house. As they looked around they couldn’t help but agree with Ray. It was spooky. All the rooms creaked and created an atmosphere of apprehension. Especially one room. It wasn’t just creaky, it was icy cold as well and as soon as you entered the room it hit your bones and made you gasp. Jaymie suddenly seized JJ’s arm and told him to listen. They stood in the middle of the room by a rickety old bed and all of a sudden were surrounded by whispers and sobbing. They froze and clutched each others hand as the whispering and sobbing changed into a cacophony of screaming and hysteric crying. JJ fled from the room and down the stairs leaving Jaymie, alone, with the screaming. She gulped and took a step back as the screaming changed again. An evil crackle of a laugh filled the room. Jaymie tried to run but couldn’t move as the laughter came closer, and closer, getting nearer every second. She suddenly felt something icy cold run through her trembling body and grab her heart with an icy hand, freezing it with screaming terror. She felt herself falling in slow motion and the coldness in her heart rushed out, leaving her unconscious on the wooden floor.

“Honey, honey, are you ok?” it was the soothing voice of her dad, pulling her to the warmth and light ahead. Jaymie reluctantly opened her blurry eyes slowly and looked around at the group of people gathered around her.

“Oh, you gave us a fright there Jaymie,” said a strange voice.

“W-w-what happened?” stammered Jaymie, trying to focus her stinging eyes.

“Young JJ here came running down the stairs saying there was a ghost in the room upstairs,” continued the stranger. At this Faye murmured “chicken” and her mother and father smirked.

“And then we heard a thud and came up to find you on the floor, unconscious my dear. Did you knock your head?” every eye was upon her now, concerned and eager to hear what had happened. She decided not to tell them about the icy coldness that went through her, fearing they may not believe her. And said that she tripped over while running out of the room and bumped her head. Faye seemed disappointed not having the opportunity to have a good laugh at her story and so left. The strange voice turned out to be a doctor and he told her to rest. Ray showed the doctor to the door and the Rubarbs, finding all the ‘excitement’ gone left the room. Jaymie, now on her own with JJ, explained in the best way she could to him about what happened when he had run out of the room. He sat on the edge of the bed and listened; with his crystal blue eyes wide open.

“I wish I wasn’t so chicken,” he complained when Jaymie had finished “ I could have been there to help you”

“It’s ok JJ,” she told him, “I’m glad you weren’t there, I’m glad you didn’t feel that terror run through you. Like I did.”

              That night, Jaymie lay awake in her sleeping bag, gazing up at the crumbling ceiling but not actually seeing it. She was remembering the feelings she felt in the room that day, though trying desperately to block them out. Although she had told JJ that she was fine, she wasn’t. She had made sure that she was as far away from that room as possible. She did not want to feel that icy coldness feeling again or the frozen, screaming terror in her heart. But it did not go away.

Hey! Sorry it’s so bad. As I said before, I was really young when I wrote it. Hopefully It’ll get better as it goes along.

Review me please!!

SakuraFreeSpirit