When I look into your eyes

Chapter 1

Hello, my name is Andrew Millers, but you can call me Andy. I am sixteen years old, a junior in high school, and in possibly the strangest relationship you'll ever hear about. You see, I'm gay, and I've known for about three years now. I didn't, however, expect to ever meet someone else like me. Believe me, it's rather depressing to be under the impression that you will never have a chance at romance. Homosexuality is not fun. People will shun you, treat you like a freak of nature, one person even suggested therapy. That was insulting. So there for, when the new guy came to school, there was no way I was about to let him know my little secret…not intentionally that is.

"Class," The teacher began. "Today we have a new student. I am proud to introduce to you Mr. James Parker."

"Please ma'am." He corrected politely. "I'm Jamie. 'James' is the name my mother uses when I'm about to get grounded."

I heard the class laugh at his comment and yet it didn't quiet register. I was way too busy looking at Jamie to notice much else. Sweet mother of Jesus, he was gorgeous. He had short black hair, and big beautiful black eyes that stood out exceptionally well against his unnaturally pale skin. Now albeit, I've never exactly been accused of being the outdoor/recreationally type, but Jamie looked like he had lived his life in an underground dungeon.

"Jamie then." The teacher continued, snapping me out of my thoughts. She quickly scanned the room for an empty desk.

"Ah! There's one." She commented. "Right next to Mr. Millers." She led Jamie over to the desk next to mine.

"Hey Jamie!" One of my classmates shouted from across the room. "You better watch out. Old Andrew over there is gay!"

"Oh shit." I muttered, slapping my forehead with the palm of my hand. "Way to be subtle Tasha." I called back.

Jamie gave me a strange look, and for a minute I thought he was going to ask to be moved. But he only shrugged and took out his stuff.

"You'd better mover." I commented softly. "You'll never get a social life around here if they see you hanging out with me."

He shook his head and redirected those big black eyes to meet my own.

"What makes you think I'm straight?" he asked coolly.

"Well…" I stammered. It had never occurred to be that he wouldn't be. "You are…aren't you?"

"Maybe I am, maybe I'm not. That's not the point. The point is that everyone deserves a friend. And by the look of things these bastards aren't giving you one." He explained calmly.

I won't deny it. Jamie's words really touched me. Being homosexual, people don't generally talk to me, so I this, didn't get this feeling very often.

"Jamie…I-" but before I had a chance to finish the bell range and homeroom ended.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

I was, as usual, sitting alone for lunch. Or I would have been had Jamie not come over and sat down next to me.

"Hey Andrew?" he asked in an offhanded voice. "What were you going to say in homeroom?"

"Oh that? Nothing just…thanks. You're the first friend I've had since I started high school."

"Oh…" Jamie seemed to feel nervous.

"Tell me what's wrong." I ordered him before taking a bite out of my sandwich.

Jamie took a deep breath, obviously stalling for time.

"Well…are you really gay?"

Most people would have taking this question as an insult. I, however, have heard worse…much worse. So rather throwing away what little dignity I had left I, naturally, got exceptionally embarrassed. I felt the heat rising in my cheeks. I felt this was answer enough…however, it wasn't.

"I should take this reaction as a yes, then?" he asked in what could only be taken as amusement.

I nodded and asked Jamie why he wanted to know. He did not, however answer me. I should have known better than to expect an answer. This isn't the kind of question you answer…and I'm not exactly the person to treat like a decent human being either. Or at least that's what most people seem to think.

"Andrew?" Jamie seemed concerned. I say 'seemed' because that was when I realized I was on the verge of tears. Any notable member of the human race would have noticed something was wrong. It isn't, after all, everyday that you meet a gay sixteen-year-old male junior who is about to cry.

"Uh…" I franticly searched the depths of my mind for a change of subject. Why did my hormones have to kick in now of all times? "C-could you do me a- uh- favor?" I stammered feebly.

"Sure. Anything you want." He replied softly. Nobody had treated me this decently in years. It felt really good to have a more substantial conversation than simply. 'Get lost twerp.' Which was the reply I generally received whenever I attempted to create conversation with someone.

"Could you call me Andy?" I asked, quiet literally willing to stoop as low as begging.

"Yeah…of course I will." He assured me

Then Jamie did the strangest thing. He grabbed onto my hand and gave it a tight squeeze. Now keep in mind that this gesture could be interpreted in one of two ways. You could a) think of it as something that couples did, or b) an act of comfort. I could only assume it was the latter. I mean, why the hell would Jamie do anything romantic with me?

"Don't worry, Andy." He told me softly. "I won't let you be lonely anymore."

I took a moment to gather myself after this comment. For, as you could have guessed, could also have multiple meanings. One of which I really wanted, the other I probably could have lived without.

"Do you really mean that?"

"I'll never lie to you."

And so we sat there until the bell rang and signaled the end of lunch period. I didn't even notice the fact that I had barely touched my lunch, or that Jamie hadn't touched his at all. I could only keep one thing on my mind that day, and that was this strange feeling I got whenever I looked into his eyes. But I wouldn't let him know that. Jesus Christ, I'd die if he ever found out. Or so I thought. Who would have thought that I of all people could be falling in love?