Some days

Some days are harder to cope with than others.
Thoughts of you swarm my mind,
I can not get away.
I was so young and so damn innocent.
You made me happy,
I felt loved, accepted, blessed.
I began to have faith in my life again.
Suddenly, being forced from my friends was not so bad,
It had after all brought me to you.
Everyday was special.
I woke up laughing,
And fell asleep smiling.

I dreamed that one day we would be together.
You confessed to me that you loved me,
But I wonder if it was the truth.
Now, we hardly ever talk.
When we do,
Only a few words are said.
I can not seem to shake the thoughts of you.
I do not cry easily,
But I do it for you.
I hate you and love you at the same time.
Some days, it seems that the easiest way to stop the pain-
But no.
I sicken myself with false hope.
I loathe myself for loving you,
For becoming so damn vulnerable.

Then I remember the joy and laughter. And the cycle, It starts over again.

A/N - go ahead and flame. This isn't my best work. It was just a way to remove the pressure in my chest. Thanks for letting me vent! Btw - this poem was inspired by the same man as Dimming Love.