His name was Drew. A normal name, unsuitable for the abnormal person
he was. He was a wonder to me and I was afraid. He used to call me his
raven, for when he played with my long black hair; he said it was as soft
as a raven's wing. Everything about me was so beautiful and enchanting to
him. My eyes, my lips my skin, everything. Everything was set in its place
so nicely; I didn't want my happiness to end. But it did.
Being the shy girl I was, I just gazed at Drew from afar. His flaxen
blonde hair was waved to perfection and his eyes were a sparkling green.
His straight nose and his strong jaw line added to his beauty so that I was
afraid to even approach him. He was perfect and wonderful, which I, a
bookworm, could never be. He was forbidden to me and that made him all the
more enjoyable to dream about. That's why I practically fainted when he
came over to me with a charming smile that could make any girl melt. He
asked me for a date that night. I must have blushed so much that he
laughed and said he would take that as a yes. After that moment on, my
dream guy and I were officially and item. I could have died from the
happiness. Oh how little I really knew about relationships then.
I was in heaven every night we went out. The dates were the ones I
always dreamed about; moonlight walks on the beach, dining in a romantic
café, the works. Then for some reason, it was limited to going to his house
and making out when his parents were out. I didn't mind too much, but I
didn't think making out the whole time was an ideal date. I was innocent
then, and didn't know what was in store for me.
Another night at his house making out didn't seem dangerous then, so
of course I would have said sure. As usual we sat on the sofa and I waited
for him to come near and start kissing me. I didn't care because I love
him, and I would have done anything for him. But something wasn't right. He
wasn't coming toward me and holding me in his arms. I turned to look at him
and found myself staring into his eyes. I looked and saw the ravenous lust
that was in the dark pools of green I loved so. As soon as I did so he
attacked me with a hungry kiss. He kissed me hard draining everything from
me as if I was some sort of a meal. He started to run his hands over my
breasts and fondle them under my thin shirt. I did not like this, not one
bit. I made a movement to shove his hands from me but he pinned me down on
the couch and kissed me harder. He was a wild man now only thinking of the
one thing a virgin dreads. And boy did I ever dread it.
He furiously unbuttoned his pants and then still pinning me down with
his legs, he unbuttoned mine as well and slid them both off. I cried out in
surprise at his actions, but he ignored me. He slid off my panties and then
slid off his boxers. I gasped as I saw him quite aroused and I knew what I
was in for. He made a moaning noise as he began to rub my breasts, making
him seem to swell even larger. I was horrified at what he was doing and
tired to move but there was no escape. I was trapped.
He then got in between my legs directing his hardness to enter me. He
held my arms down tight at my sides. Before he took me, he gave me a wicked
smile, not the charming and kindly one he always reserved for me. I widened
my eyes, as his firm sex ripped through me like a thousand knives and made
me bleed. I screamed out in pain, and he took it as a sign of pleasure. He
began to go faster, driving it into me with more passion each time. I began
to weep out of pain; not only for the force of which he took me, but also
of the fact that this was the man I was supposed to love. And now I hated
His eyes rolled back and let out a loud groan as I felt something
warm flood my insides. He moaned one final time and slowly retreated and
collapsed on top of me.
He curled my hair under is fingers murmuring the name Raven until he fell
asleep and I still laying there in utter despair.
* * *
That was all 3 years ago when I was just 16 and I still haven't been able
to let go.
As I gaze at my reflection in the mirror, I only see the ghost of what once
was a shy, innocent girl with romantic fancies. She knew not of where fate
would lead her. The path it decided to choose was the path of hardening of
hearts and the loss of trusting anyone but herself. A more solid figure
appears which is what is now who I am. A strong, determined, young woman
who will not let any man hurt her. But at a price of ever loving anyone
He violated me in the worst possible way he could have. Drew destroyed my
love for him and there was no way he would be able to get it back. That is
a greater loss then he will ever know because I had so much to offer, but
he took advantage of it and thought he could control me. Drew was just one
of the many men that could make your heart flutter and then crush it in an
instant. But I am a raven, a symbol of strength. And this raven's heart
will never flutter after a man who seems to good to be true.