Summer Day

            My eyes suddenly shot open, startling me with a bluish haze that stained the world around me, letting me know that I had fallen asleep under the sun. I lay there for a bit on what seemed to be metal, not caring to sit up or try and remember where the hell I actually was. I yawned, as if to make an exclamation to the world that I couldn’t care less. The warm powerful light of the sun beat down upon my face, trying to find its way through my squinted eyelids. My right arm lifted almost involuntarily to try and block the sun, but this proved to just be tiresome. So, I just shut my eyes, hoping to maybe fall asleep again. Finally, as my mind began to fill with thoughts, I remembered that I had walked to the baseball field through the woods from my house. My back was uncomfortably trying to find a place for the bleacher seat to rest between my shoulder blades. As if triggering my recollections, my back slid into a comfortable position and suddenly memories began to reveal themselves.

            There was nothing more I’d love to do on a hot summer afternoon than just lay down somewhere and daydream. I seemed to be quite good at it, and summer was the best time to flaunt my talents. My mind seemed to be spinning with the sound of my newest composed song that I had recorded in my basement the day before. I whispered my lyrics into the air; chanting them just because they were stuck in my head, and because they enhanced the sentimental mood I was in. I was missing my girlfriend, Rebecca, the intelligent and incredibly beautiful girl that I was more than proud to put my arms around. Sometimes I think I’m never quite satisfied with the songs I write because there’s no way to find a melody as beautiful as her. I would always try to compare her to the beauty of nature in some of my lyrics, but once again would fail. There was nothing in the world that could possibly give me the same feeling as that which I felt while just being with her. While lying there on the bleachers, my memories took me back to various times I spent with her. I laughed at myself a bit for being so embarrassingly awkward in just trying to show her how much in fact I truly loved her. Somehow, Becky, (as I would call her), would always put up with my foolish comments or flirting; pressing her forehead against mine as we embraced playfully and slowly let our lips touch. She’d press her face so close to mine that her dark brown eyes would seem to almost connect, sending shivers down my back as I’d stare into their mysterious absence of animosities.         

            I sat up, opening my eyes and swearing at the bleachers for being so damn uncomfortable. The field out in front of me looked to be a little less than a football field long, but seemed longer just then when there was no one there but me. A haze-like humidity was visible over the sunniest areas, where the sunlight through the surrounding trees made the grass glow brightly in random patches. This enticing interpretation of one’s own paradise lured my thoughts into a seemingly frivolous state of mind, but I was still preoccupied. Becky was away, somewhere at camp in another state. I sighed and rested my head in my hands, letting my fingertips grow accustomed to the new feeling of hair on my face. My mother kept telling me that a 15 year old shouldn’t have a beard, but then again what’s wrong with looking 19 for the summer. I was pretty sure that Becky probably would have wanted me to shave it clean, but it was summer and she was away, so I figured what the hell. My face was drawn into a smile as I chuckled at myself again, this time finding it amusing that the only upside of her absence is the fact that I didn’t have to care if I looked like shit!

            As I continued to stare across the field, it reminded me of the big field in front of our high school. During the spring of the school year, I convinced my little group of lunch friends to eat outside under the shade of a thick maple tree out in the field. We would kick back after many torturous classes, (sometimes take our shoes off,) and talk about our day. The feeling of this freedom and bliss caused me to become quite energetic at times, and I’d take off across the field as fast as my bare feet would carry me. Once I just collapsed and lay sprawled across the grass in the middle of the field, gazing into the blue skies, and letting the sun beat down on my face until Becky’s shadow appeared. Her light brown hair became highlighted in the sun and it glimmered in a way that could bring me to my knees. She playfully sat down on my stomach, fighting her cute little grin from sneaking across her crimson lips, and then called out to the others that I was dead. I watched her make short little glances at me as she sat there with her arms folded and resting upon her knees, where her tight jeans had been torn. In one quick motion I sat up and pushed my arms through her open green, checkered shirt, and wrapped my arms around the back of her radiant white tank top. We rolled onto the grass and our laughter played a melody that will forever sing upon that field, to be found by perhaps some other young boy and girl in the warm breezes to come. Becky snuggled up closer in my embrace. I kissed the top of her head, and then rested my cheek against hers in the gesture formally known as a hug. I purposely hid my eyes so she couldn’t see my small tears from absolute happiness, and the lull of a sweet tenderness that had entranced my entire body.

            My daydream began to feel quite real as I felt those tears fall once again, sitting there on the bleachers. Involuntarily blinking, I was cut off from my dream and sent back to my hard metal seat.  It seemed that all I wondered was if perhaps she was missing me as much. The Saturday night before she was to leave, I had planned to take her out to dinner and maybe a movie to perhaps have one last great memory to hang onto. For some reason she didn’t pick up the phone, or call back over the course of the day, so I just gave up. At times my friends had tried to joke with me, saying that Becky would find some other greater guy to hook up with at camp, but I tried hard to fight away these thoughts. I knew Becky better than that.

            I had no idea what time it was, and frankly I didn’t quite care. The pillow like clouds drifted slowly through the gentle current of the clear blue sky. It felt like it was around 5 pm, but then again I had gone to sleep at 6 AM so my sense of time was thrown off. I had spent the previous night at one of my best friend’s house, Philip. Another extremely close friend of mine, James, was there as well. The summer had barely begun and I had already spent a ton of time at Phil’s house. It had come to be known as the hang out for our “gang”, so to speak. The night before, Phil had decided to go to sleep a bit earlier than normal, (at 2:30 AM), so James and I went for a walk. We took off our shoes and walked along the street barefoot, feeling the rough and cold cement against our toes. An eerie pale glow from a full moon lit the nocturnal world that mostly seemed to be sleeping to the naked eye. Several lampposts were scattered here and there, so we had more than enough light to see where we were going. A little ways down the road, James and I had stopped to talk. (Somehow we seem to have the deepest conversations at the strangest times of day.) We shared many secrets and stories from the past few years, laughing at some of the funniest, and even at times crying together. We were interrupted though, by James’s unstoppable craving for a soda. So, remembering that we had finished off all of Phil’s snacks, we decided to head out for the supermarket. This gave us more time to talk and I’m grateful to have friends who I can talk my heart out to. We walked about 20 minutes more and reached James’s house. Neither of us had money on us, so he decided to sneak into his house and find his mother’s purse. Both of us snuck up the driveway quietly, watching our shadows intertwine with those of the leaves. The moon almost seemed too bright, shining down on us and revealing us from the darkness. My bare feet were pricked by several small rocks that littered the cement driveway as we slowly made our way towards the house. James pushed through his gate and we walked along his patio to the back door. His mother’s cigarette butts were smoldering in an ashtray. “She had someone over,” James muttered, as he glanced at the disorderly positioning of the patio furniture.

            I felt my stomach jump as he jammed a key loudly into the doorknob. Quickly, my hand shot out to grab his shoulder in precaution. “You don’t have an alarm do you?”

            His reply was a snort, then he pushed the door open and I grimaced at the loud creaking of the aged door. “In a house this old…?” he muttered. 

            We stepped into the kitchen and he told me to wait there. I did as he said and stood there quietly as he slipped off into the shadows of his dark house. His footsteps on the stairs caused even more creaking and my hand moved slowly to grip the doorknob. I could hear James making his way down the hallway upstairs, but suddenly a loud creak came from directly above me! I jumped backwards, feeling my heartbeat leap into the pace of a humming bird’s. No sooner had I heard this, James came bolting down the stairs and dashed straight at me. I threw open the door and jumped down the stairs onto the patio. After stumbling a bit from the fall, I regained my balance and sprinted down the driveway with James. I was wearing my jeans very loose, and I felt them sliding down off my thighs as I ran. James got ahead of me, as I was slowed in making sure my pants stayed on. We dashed out into the main road and stood there for a moment to catch our breath. After several seconds of panting, we looked at one another and fell over laughing. Luckily it was at such a bizarre time of morning because we were in the middle of the street and no cars were coming through. I walked over to a streetlight, squinting at my watch. It was 4:45 am!  “Let’s go,” I exclaimed.

            Once again I found myself laughing, yet sitting alone in my field. I swung my legs over the side of the bleachers and hopped off onto the grass. I shoved my hands into my pockets and started off across the field. My eyes were staring at the grass as my sneakers came across each blade, but my thoughts were still elsewhere. A sudden breeze caused me to lift my head and let the calming warm air dance through my hair. I watched it blow through the lazy trees, forcing their rich green leaves to become animated. My legs kept carrying me until I reached the baseball diamond. I carelessly rounded the bases as if I was actually scoring a run, then surrendered to the temptation of writing in the sand. I dragged the toe of my shoe through the damp maroon sand, slowly carving my initials into it somewhere around second base. Then, feeling it was necessary to carve Becky’s initials in as well, I lifted my foot again. I stood back after finishing the last letter, secretly thinking to myself how in someway those two sets of initials looked so perfect together. An idea crossed my mind, and to appease my daring sense of curiosity, I crossed out the last letter of Becky’s initial, and added mine. This brought an endless smile to my face, and I was content.

With this being done, I began to walk home. I still had no idea how much time I had spent at the baseball field. It could have been a few hours, or maybe even half the day; it didn’t really matter. If anyone would have watched me, they’d have probably labeled me as a completely bored 15 year old boy, (or 19 to an onlooker.); but I was sure that I had had one of the best times of my life. Personally I don’t think it’s a bad thing to do absolutely nothing productive during the summer, especially with a sense of adventure as astute as mine. I could probably spend the whole summer just dreaming, but then again I wouldn’t have time for anymore early morning shopping sprees. Soon though, in a few months actually, school would begin again. My life would once again come down from the clouds and I would be forced into the secular routine, leaving me begging for another summer afternoon in my own field of dreams.