Yours Truly

Summary: The pre-quel to the chapter of 'Musings' titled: In Awe of You.

~ Yours Truly ~

Dear ___________________,

By the time you get this, I believe I'll have gone. Of course, you can still see me and relive our memories in your own mind, but I'll no longer physically be there.

I've yet to hear your thoughts about me and it has always been my greatest regret not telling you mine sooner. I guess our friendship had always been a barrier of sorts against it. You would have probably severed our interactions if you heard. What do they say again? Nothing ventured, nothing gained?

You do remember the first time we met, right? That time had been my first day at school. You sat in the second row, two seats left from the middle, goggling and yet you still maintained that dignity I've gotten used to. I remembered your face clearly even after class had been dismissed an hour later. Your hair was the first thing that caught my attention. Black with blue streaks - you are quite the individual, I must say.

We got on fine from the start, when I approached you to make a polite attempt at conversation. First about weather (surprise, surprise) and then about work, the latest movies and finally an arrangement to meet after school at the school gates. Fine work, if I do say so myself. Walking you home became a habit, a scheduled thing, from then on and I found it safe to call you my best friend. I believe our friendship then progressed on to lunches, movies, study partners and school dances?

I think my one, most idiotic, forgetful mistake was not telling you exactly how I felt before I found out about the cancer. Terminal cancer, located in the liver, just when my life was at its best. Still, I couldn't find my courage to tell you those three pesky words: I love you. Always have, always will.

There. I've done, said, written (whatever) what I had originally set out to do. You've dragged it out of me - a solid, written confession - before I could ever do the same to you. Laugh if you want, it won't matter any more. You've probably never felt the same way. If you did, though, come visit me, wherever I may be at this point. I'll know.

I love you. After going around so many twists and turns, I had to say it. I love you. I guess it's been a silent, mutual competition between us. Are you satisfied?

You won.

Yours Truly,

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