AN: Hahhhhh, and now the second chapter. The one Chris W was supposed to do. Curse him. R&R, and enjoy everyone! (Doughnut knows I didn’t enjoy it when I was making this…grumble… *stalks off muttering under her breath*

Reporter – Hello and welcome back to the History channel. And I’ll be your host, Joe Schmoe for this trip through colonial Latin America. Ah! Sir! Come here please.

Peninsular enters.

Peninsular – Yes?

Reporter – Hi! I’m the reporter for the History Channel. Is it true how your place of birth and family determine your social rank?

Peninsular – yes, it is true. I’m a peninsular, the highest rank. People like me are from Spain and Portugal. We have important jobs in the government, army, and Catholic Church. The next in rank after me are Creoles – here’s one now! Excuse me? Excuse me, sir!

Creole enters.

Creole – Yes?

Peninsular – could you be so kind as to tell us the reason you are a Creole? This man here is from the History Channel- whatever that is. I don’t have cable.

Creole – oh, of course. I am a Creole because even though I have Spanish or Portuguese parents, I was born in Latin America. People like me own ranches, haciendas, mines, and some even had positions in local government- except you high-and-mighty PENINSULARS don’t give us as mush respect!

Peninsular and Creole glare at each other as mestizo and mulatto enter. The two continue glaring at each other during the conversation with the newcomers, and finally break into a fight once they are done.

Reporter – Ah excuse me sirs, could you please show us your place in the “social ladder?”

Mestizo – I’m of both European and American Indian descent. Most of us mestizos are poor, but some own small farms.

Mulatto – And what a lucky guy I am- I’m in the poorest level you can get- a mulatto. I’m of both African and European descent, and of all the social classes, I’m treated the worst. Well, no, wait, I guess the slaves get the worst treatment.

Reporter – and where are the slaves from?

Mulatto – oh, the slaves are all Africans and Indians. No wait- only the Africans are slaves. Indians aren’t slaves but they’re so low that everyone thinks of them as slaves-and treat them like slaves, too.

Peninsular and Creole begin fighting. Mestizo and mulatto run off in fear and reporter tries to conclude his segment but is hit by the fighters and knocked under.

Reporter – This has been Joe Schmoe for the History Channel-AAAAAAAAUUUUUGH

Come back in with reporter talking to someone about something random and silly. Partiers are in the background. Reporter does double take when someone clears their throat and he sees camera on; abruptly ends conversation.

Reporter – Ah, er, uh, you didn’t hear that. Anyway, I’m your host Joe Schmoe again this time in Brazil. I was just talking to this kind sir about why everyone is celebrating. Sir? You can take it from here.

“Kind Sir” (Brazilian noble) – Well, Joe, you already know about the social ranking of Latin America. And you also know how the Creoles are a little disappointed in the fact that they are ruled over by peninsulars.

Reporter – I-

Noble – Oh, come on. I have cable. And you’re the host. You saw that fight between the peninsular and Creole.

Reporter – Oh yeeeeaaaaaaahhhhh…

Noble – anyway, all the Creoles were getting inspired by all the revolutions going on already in places like France and the United States. But the thing that finally made up their minds was a nearby revolution from the slaves in St. Domingue. That was the spark needed for everyone to rally together and fight for freedom. So now Creoles everywhere are fighting for freedom because of that- except, luckily, the people of Brazil. All they had to do was ask me, the one who rules this colony, and I declared that we broke away. We’ve waited three years and we haven’t had a single war. And today the King of Portugal, my father, promised to give us an answer. Oh, what’s this?

Partier comes up with a piece of parchment and hands it to the noble.

Noble calls everyone’s attention and reads aloud that Portugal grants Brazil its independence.

Noble – like I said- everyone’s warring but us! WOOHOOOOOOOO!!

Reporter tries to close again but is overcome by mob of partiers and is sucked under… again.

Reporter – This has been Joe Schmoe for (mad lib- Aaack! Oof! Ow! or Hey watch it!) the History- AAAAAAUUUUUGH